@Ashlee Seaton… wow. Okay. I can totally see that, and… no words. Just tug on my heartstrings, why dont'cha? I'd really love to hear the inner thoughts of Blanche, and part of me wants to know how Trygve would react when he gets the news. I'm both exited to see how you would write this, and also just… really, really sad. It might be cliche, but you can totally rework it in your favor!
My story is about two sisters fighting and one ends up being killed by the other and her dying scene is:
“Please don’t forget me,” Ana whispered, and I felt another tear fall down my cheek.
“How could I forget you?” I asked.
“Not me. The real me. The me you grew up with, and became your best friend. I want you to forget about the horrible things I’ve done, and focus on the wonderful memories we shared together,” she said, and I pulled her into a hug one last time. I closed my eyes to savor the moment before setting her back down."
I guess since were all pointing out our favorite of our own deaths my favorite of mine is from Legend (book 3) Eric`s death. I guess ill just copy and paste lol.
Zatoi fell to his knees, his eyes widened with horror as he gazed upon the crimson sky it looked like a sunset in the center of the sky.
¨What have you done¨ He muttered angrily ¨What have you done!¨ Eric turned toward Radish and Jacob, the two boys trembled with fear
¨Go¨ Eric said ¨Im not leaving this planet¨ Jacob started fiddling with the handheld teleporter, Radish stepped closer
¨You dont have to punish yourself¨ Radish insisted ¨Come with us, please!¨ Zatoi charged at the group, Eric responded quickly pulling several streams of water from the sewage system and blasting Zatoi with it, he was knocked back by the impact but recovered fast.
¨Get the hell out of here!¨ he shouted at the kids
¨Radish lets go¨ Jacob had the handheld running, ready for another jump. Eric had a moment to turn and take in the two of them as Jacob grabbed ahold of Radish, Radish was reaching for Eric in a desperate attempt to take him with them. Eric could have, it would have been so easy to step into Radishs grasp and escape to Omara with everyone else. Maybe the Omarians would set the refugees a city and they would have to live out the rest of their lives in poverty. Maybe they would get slaughtered on the spot, Shannon was not called a mad dog for nothing after all. But what about what he had already done, to Jake and Persa, those poor souls did not deserve what he did to them but he did it anyways. He wished he regretted what he did but he didnt. not one damned bit. Thats what he hated about himself the most, he knew he could survive, he knew he could escape and get another chance at life, he also knew that he deserved to live. Anyone would agree, everyone would agree that no one deserved death, that everyone deserved a second chance. But. But. But he did not want a second chance. Eric took a step forward as Radish and Jacob vanished.
¨Why do you remain?¨ Zatoi was on his feet again approaching slowly wary of attack. ¨Could you not escape with your friends?¨ Eric let out a soft laugh and looked up towards the asteroid seemed to pierce the atmosphere
¨Thank you¨ he whispered to no one ¨thank you for letting my life be worth something¨ Zatoi attacked again, this time Eric did nothing as Zatoi tore him limb from limb.
CHAPTER 57- The Kleoan Tragedy
Not to be a grammar freak but shouldn't it be your instead of you're?
as trashy as it is if you are talking about the
with your friends?¨
then that is the correct your
???
Wait, whos were you talking about?
Allania: So this is the end? Sad. I would've liked more time with you.
Ethan: I'm coming home…
Max: I hid 10 million dollars in the-
Mariana: I may as well tell you… I'm actually *****
So, my character has a 90% chance of dying when she faces off against the guy who controls the hive mind and all that BS. In her last hour, she would take them down with her. If it was Creed, the scenario would be totally diffrent.
Avalyn: Hey, Creed, don' worry ´bout it. You´ll see me again.
Creed crying: I wish I could´ve stayed with you.
Avalyn: Listen, when you get…home…I want you to turn my desk inside out. Tear it apart. I left something in there for you in the event I died. Listen to me, you stay safe. If I find you in hell a year from now I´m kicking your ghost-ass.
Aspen: remember to like, comment, and subscribe…
Pine: oof
Samuel 1: I'm becoming MCR
Patagonia: lol byeee
Kayleb: what's the wifi password in heaven?
Joel: I'm gay
Alexis: tell Brendon Urie I love him
Solomon: I'm on the hiiiiighway to heck k
Naomi: jeez finally
Haleigh: oh my lawrd i get to see all the doggos!!
Rory: I am shook-eth
Aaron: oh come on i haven't even lived yettt
Jasmine: No you hang u-
Kat: where's my phone?
Samuel 2: I'm sorry. love. I had to do this….
(aughhh the last one)
Most of my characters are too darn dramatic, y'know?
Meril: i'm too pretty to die!
Sammal: (several minutes of swearing)
Menny: Can you please do that somewhere else? I have places to be.
Evariste: You know, I thought I'd be hung for treason before this.
Roul: Oh, good job, nice arc there. Very nice swing. Let's hope it sticks this time, huh? (the joys of being an almost unkillable necromancer)
Fenin would probably just utter a single curse word
Ember: "T-Take care of Bryan for me, please."
Cause of death: Sycore embodied in Tom. (Yeah, it sounds weird.)
James: "I'm sorry. This has to be done, goodbye."
Cause of death: Suicide to save the world
Hunter: "I'm sorry Ember, I wasn't strong enough."
Cause of death: None
Audra: "This is payback for my crimes. I deserve this."
Cause of death:None
Tom: "I stopped- I stopped Sycore."
Cause of death: None
Megan: "The creator had this planned from the beginning. Don't worry, Sycore and the power of the amulets will not spread out of this world!"
Cause of death: None
Bryan: "Tell Ember she's the best sister ever."
Cause of death:None
Hicia: "This curse will not spread to you, even at the cost of my own life. I didn't matter anyway, I'm cursed too."
Cause of death: Suicide to save the world from the curse.
Birane: "wAIt THis WOrkS?"
Cause of death: Gently killed by Hicia.
Sycore: "YOU FOOLS! DO YOU NOT WANT TO FREE? YOU TRAITORS!"
Cause of death: Violently killed by Hicia.
Diami: "I am not good at socializing with humans." (Same Diami, same.)
Cause of death: Emo James
Scolding hot pain coursed through her veins with an excruciating slowness causing her body to convulse . she curled around the knife that was protruding from her abdomen as her life bleed out around her. She didn't remember how it had got there, what she did know was that she didn't have much longer, the world was starting to slip away and the dark abyss started to come closer. Suddenly strong warm arms lifted her, the sudden movement tore a agony ridden scream straight from her soul. shh, shh, it'll be ok she heard from a familiar male voice as he hugged her close to his chest. she felt as though she had been saved from her own personal hell as she opened her eyes and looked up into her lovers face. her pain faded into the distance, all that mattered was that he was there. troy? she asked as she looked into his tear streaked face. yes? he replied his voice to cracking. I love you more than anything, she sobbed I wouldn't want to die with anyone else but you. he hugged her tighter as a sobs racked his body, you wont die he comforted. they both knew that wasn't true. she laid her head on his chest for the last time and listened to his sobs as the darkness started to enclose her. in her last moment of light a memory arose, troy thrusting the knife into her. the night claimed her soul as her body remained in her murders arms.
tell me what you think^^^, its my first time doing this
It's really good! Really interesting twist. My only problems are maybe you be more consistent with your capitulation and use quotation marks for dialog.
Maybe i'm just a grammar nazi.
Love it!!
Depends on which character it would be and what situation they're in, but some of the ones I thought of are "Here we go again" and "Oops…"
It just depends on how they die, but here's one of mine if they died.
Destiny: I guess this was what was written in my destiny.
Dante: I guess it's too late…to make up for everything I've done
Honestly what I'm planning for his last words to be
So far I just have two of the characters who would definitely die
Ryllachor: Goddammit run!
(He never swears, so that's rare, he sacrificed himself so the other people can go)
Hyenros: I'm sorry brother…Please take care of him…
(By him he meant his young son)
Robin: Well, I guess it's about time, isn't it, Gray? I've been in the hospital so much it was bound to happen sooner or later.
Grayson: Take care of Robin (probably to Timothy)
Timothy: I never really got to tell you, but… I love you (probably to Grayson)
Dr. Al: Pretty ironic that I died, huh? Being a doctor and I you'd have thought I could save myself.
Maddox: I wonder what death is like? Perhaps it would be nice… peaceful. I know I've sort of wanted this for a while now, but now that it's happening… I'm not sure if I made the right decision.
Lucas: Finally… I'll get to see him and mom again…
Zach: Don't cry for me, you look like a wimp. But in all honesty, I love you guys.
Aren: His last words…
Lloyd: Run, Nate! Run while you still can!
Nathaniel: I can't believe his sacrifice was in vain…
Caire: Bury me in the forest, please… I want my body to help nature if nothing else.
Is it getting dark in here…..
Depends
M: Gets shot in the head cant say anything
Zackary: Broken neck and is lonely, slowly dying on forest floor So here I am, alone, back where I started all of those years ago…
Cameron: Dying of sickness Please, stay, I wish to say more…
Neo: Stabbed in the stomach I know I'll be back, I can't die…