forum Hey~! I wanna hear your stories :)

Started January 18, 2018 by @adidaiida

tune

It's called 24th Century Madhouse, and it's about a group of mercenaries who travel to other planets looking for jobs.

@shurikenwolfbadass_13, my internet was bing very weird last night. Anywhozit, thank you! I have four siblings, Angelo as the oldest, then Clara, Roane, and Andrea as the youngest. Their ability are all different, based on their personalities.
In their family, their father favored Angelo moreso than the other kids, and it showed.
Angelo liked the attention, but not when he screwed up and his dad got mad at him. Not helping is that Angelo is very volatile, to the point that he struggles not to get angry all the time. His ability is to absorb the auras of others, which can, depending on how long or malevolent/benevolent Angelo is at that moment, take their life-force, memories, and/or powers. I'll most likely retcon this a bit later, since it's a very 'all powerful' power.
Clara, as the second-oldest, always has a bone to pick with Angelo and the war tactics to do it with. She really likes to fight, but her father never noticed because he was grooming Angelo, and she was a girl. Clara can use her own aura to make different kinds of weapons, like a dagger, axe, sword, etc. Very useful.
Roane is the peacemaker. He always at least tries to stop Clara and Angelo from fighting, and tries to keep Andrea away whenever they squabble. Roane is the other half of Clara, so to speak. He's the brains, Clara's the brawn. His ability is to channel his aura inwardly to gain higher intelligence. This was vey useful in high school and college, or Roane hoped.
And finally, Andrea! My sweet naive babe. She's the very opposite of your usual youngest. Very sweet and quiet, she loves the outdoors and hates for people to fight. So her siblings stress her out almost all the time and she then retreats to the woods. Andrea can actually see people's aura, and sometimes cleanse them.

So yeah, those are the four Vigorus siblings! I love them so much.

Hey, that's badass… I don't think it's too overpowered a power.

How long does it take him to drain a power?
To what extent can he do so?

Depends on how hard the person is fighting against him. If it's for their memories and/or life-force, usually it's somewhere around five to seven minutes, in which he's completely vulnerable. If it's their power, well, it's upward to fifteen or more.

I think you've got it wrong… That's probably not powerful enough.

How would you suggest I fix it?

Maybe three minutes… Hey, but do what you want…

No, no, I'd prefer getting feedback than not :) It's hard to view my own characters with an outsider's eye, y'know?

Does he win any fights with it? Is that considered powerful compared to the usual?

Yeah, actually yes! When he would go into battle, he would immediately head straight for the commanding officers/person in charge. Draining them, and half of the time killing them, meant that the enemy soldiers would be without orders, and thusly fall apart. (I know this isn't how war works /exactly/, but I'm still trying to figure out my universe, soooo…)

That's exactly how war works, but they have protocols if the main officer is down. Also, the next in command is usually in charge if this happens. Though your thing would probably work… You've got it!

Also, does he have any other skills to rely on while he's draining?

Thank you! Yeah, I really ought to write some scenes where Angelo, Clara, and Roane use their abilities. Right now I've just been exploring Andrea's side of things.

What do you mean?

Cool, that sounds like prime story development…

This a small part of a story I'm writing with Andrea about her Seeing.

“OK, so what do you see?” Andrea smiled at the curiosity in her friend’s voice. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Letting it out slowly, she focused inwardly on her own memories. Playing swords with Clara, reading with Roane, climbing up Earth’s trees, Andrea centered herself. Then she opened her eyes, and Looked.
His external colors were writhing and scared, yet the colors weren’t. Soft blues melded with pastel greens, all good signs. But they were all overlaid with a dirty brown. Every color was so fluid and chaotic.
Andrea frowned, and drew back into herself. With a small ‘pop!’ the spell was broken. Cole handed her a granola bar. He knew how hungry she got after Seeing. Andrea still had her eyes closed. Countless times she had discovered that it was not good to open her eyes immediately after Seeing. Slowly, surely, the the world and her senses came back into focus. Andrea shivered from the gusty wind that had decide to announce itself on this winter day. She could hear Cole’s breathing, slight but excited gasps. Andrea smiled, he was always interested in what she Saw. The bench underneath her grounded her, reminded Andrea that she was still here, in this world. Chewing on the bar, she considered what she had Seen and opened her eyes.

(Soft blue is peacefulness and communication, pastel colors are sensitivity and a need for serenity, but overlaid brown is insecurity)

Hey, it's really deep that everything in your series has meaning… You know, the colors and all.

I think that was professional level writing by the way… Nice work.

Oh my goodness, thank you!!! Yeah, I always prefer to have meaning to what I write, because what's the fun of it just being shallow? And this is just the unedited draft so far… But thank you so much!! :D

Hey, no problem.

I feel out of place here, mine is so different from everyone else's. I give you the plot idea.

This story takes place in a world that's just like ours with our same technology but, magic exists but is only extremely rare.
Everyone has one of the three genres of elemental powers earth, fire, sky, and within these genres, each person gets one ability, they just don't know it. The thing is, it takes higher magic to unlock these skills.
There are also three Amulets that represent each of the major races of carnivorous animals. Wildcat, Wild dog, and Wild bird. There are Keepers who influence the owner and help them make decisions on what would be best for the world. These amulets have disappeared and appeared at random throughout time. With this power, you could unlock your Elemental powers. When two teens both discover this power to defeat a rising enemy, they discover that these amulets are far from a blessing.
They're a curse.
When the Elemental powers start to change and the advantage is given to their enemy, who's Elemental Genre is the biggest of them all, sky, they discover that there was a guardian looking over the Amulet powers and Elemental powers, balancing them out.
There WAS.
She was murdered.
And whoever has her power, is the strongest of them all.
The power to shapeshift and wield all the Elemental powers.
And well, he won't stop till he gets his revenge.

That's not too out of place… It's actually rather interesting and unique

Once upon a time, there was a little pig. She lived with mummy, duddy, and an obnoxious little twirp of a brother. They ate and rested upon a pretty little blue house, rolling down the hill on warm sunny days and sledding on particularly snowy ones. The little pig's name was Peppa, and she was also quite British. Peppa's brother, whom was very little, had no name due to the fact that he was soon to be butchered and turned into an absolutely delectable hotdog. Mummy's name was Ms. Pig, and her father's name was Mr. Pig. On complete coincidence, they were also pigs. (Had Peppa been a chicken, Mr. Pig would have suspected fowl play)

One day, Peppa was watching the clouds with her best friend, Snup Dog. The wispy, feathery, blotchy and white shapes in complete random order, ghosting upon a sea of blue… all of it was absolutely marvelous! She was quite content, having just eaten a chocolate bar, and happy. It was then a question arose in her feeble mind.

"Snup Dog, oink oink," she snorted, "Will day is tomorrow?" Snup Dog looked at her with his dog eyes, and contemplated. He was a dog, so he was able to understand everything.

"Tomorrow doesn't exist," he began, "because this world we live in measures everything we do in time- yet, time is simply something we perceive. Life and death don't exist if you don't exist– therefore, does something really exist? You don't really exist, and neither do I. The optic back in my brain forces an image to be assumed in separate cortexes of my brain, and therefore, I simply have made you up in my brain. In the assumption that time does exist, though, there are no guarantees that we will all still be around to experience tomorrow. Freak car accidents, the occasional choked grape, and even plane crashes– they happen everyday.Even if we live past tomorrow, o matter what we love, or do, we will all end up rotting underneath the layers of the ground. To be feasted upon by the hungry teeth of worms,. Our hopes, our aspirations– all that we love will either die before us, or die with us- as I did when I lost my little litter to pneumonia. We aren't even guaranteed a planet to die upon- as we barely cling to the grasp of gravity, we could easily be swung out of orbit to freeze and die in the lonesome corners of our universe…" Peppa frowned, and turned back to her makeshift planner.

"The 14th it is," she assumed. Snup Dog retorted,
"Actually, 23rd,"

The end.

One of these is not like the others. @MeadowOfSilence, I like it! It sounds interesting

@luna @shurikenwolfbadass_13 Thank you! I call it The Untold Secrets of The Meadow. I'm glad you like it!