forum Best D&D fails

Started October 04, 2018 by @Becfromthedead group

tune

Let’s hear them!

One show I watch called Dice, Camera, Action had the party inadvertently fighting a dragon turtle in the waters of Chult. They used an egg bomb with the power of 10,000 magic missiles and literally FED it to him! However, the explosion killed the dragon turtle and caused a tsunami that washed away an entire city. Yeah, the Zhentarim weren't very happy, nor were the Xanathar when the Zhents betrayed them to kill the perpetrators!

Oh noooo. I thought I had some good ones, but washing away an entire city wins.

My charter tried to run through an illusion of a wall of snakes, I rolled for bravery critical fall i tried 2 times, both where falls

Big mood. I was trying to deceive another party member, who was trying to seduce my adopted human son, into thinking that he was a minor, and therefore off limits. The highest I rolled in this little bit was like a 6… She knew I was lying about something, but didn't know what the truth of everything was. Also, I rolled just high enough to intimidate my human son to go along with the act, which saved me.

very bad very foolish

Not me, but a friend of mine got one very high ability roll when creating a character, and the rest of his rolls were pretty low. He put the high score into charisma, and the lowest score (-5) into intelligence. Not only was he ridiculously dumb, but he had a cursed mask attached to his face for intimidation, which made people so afraid of him the charisma didn't really matter. Once, he tied a mimic to a rope and dragged it along with us for ages. It did some considerable damage to a couple others in our campagne, and finally our DM just told him it escaped one night in the middle of the night.

Not me, but a friend of mine got one very high ability roll when creating a character, and the rest of his rolls were pretty low. He put the high score into charisma, and the lowest score (-5) into intelligence. Not only was he ridiculously dumb, but he had a cursed mask attached to his face for intimidation, which made people so afraid of him the charisma didn't really matter. Once, he tied a mimic to a rope and dragged it along with us for ages. It did some considerable damage to a couple others in our campagne, and finally our DM just told him it escaped one night in the middle of the night.

I heard what happend DM

flower queen

One show I watch called Dice, Camera, Action had the party inadvertently fighting a dragon turtle in the waters of Chult. They used an egg bomb with the power of 10,000 magic missiles and literally FED it to him! However, the explosion killed the dragon turtle and caused a tsunami that washed away an entire city. Yeah, the Zhentarim weren't very happy, nor were the Xanathar when the Zhents betrayed them to kill the perpetrators!

WHY?!?!?!?!

We were fighting a boss once and my Dungeon Master rolled a nat one so the beast exploded.

a while ago during a current campaign where we're sailing around on a steam-powered ship, doing whatever we want and being confused about a lot of things, our ship got stuck in some wild seaweed. Something similar had happened before with some superspecial seaweed that became hard as steel when dried.
Now, I liked this steel seaweed and wanted more of it and thinking that this was the same type of situation I turned into a water dino creature because I'm a druïd and jumped of the ship right into the middle of the plants, only to find they were the sea's version of shambling mounts. It took the monk and paladin two turns to get from the other end of the ship to where I was…

I was playing D&D for the first time and my team and I found a hole so my mate gave me his rope for me to slide down and I think I rolled for strength and got a very low number so instead of climbing down the rope, I full-on jumped down a (probably) 10 metre drop and faceplanted on the stone floor, was knocked out and my health went down to 1 and I stayed like that for about the rest of the game.

My friend was playing D&D with a few other people, but he wasn't paying much attention to what was going on. The party came across a trapped room, and rather than having the rogue disarm the traps, they said: "Hey Brett, there's treasure in this room!" "Wait, really?!" He ran in and activated all of the traps.

Okay…I was playing with my friends during a mini-sample-like campaign. My character was some homebrew race (embodied mouther if you want to look it up on the D&D wiki) monk. In the very beginning, I was lvl. 3 and everyone was trapped in a prison cell. Me, being pretty stupid, decides to straight up punch the iron bars (we oddly enough had our weapons, but I didn't want either of my two short swords to break.) I did 13 damage (somehow, don't ask)…NOTHING happened. I look at my DM with a look of pure confusion as his bugbear barbarian breaks down the iron bars with a swing of his large war hammer.
Maybe not the worst that could've happened, but it could be tied with the fact that I thought (outside of the campaign) my character could beat a Beholder. I look at the monster manual later on, and then begged my DM not to summon a Beholder on my character.

Not a fail, but we taught a child how to steal.

But in other news, my best friend wasn't paying attention during one of our campaigns and killed an unconscious man by throwing her axe at him, all in front of said man's daughter. All because she didn't know he was unconscious.

In the same Dice, Camera, Action show, the party commandeered a submarine. It sank because they forgot to close the door.

One of our party members died and we tried to cremate him, but did it wrong and also looted his body beforehand. He was a ranger who had a wolf following him around. The wolf only follows us around now because we have food.

I once derailed a one-shot campaign in the first five minutes because we were bargaining with the person hiring us about payment, but all my character cared about was apple pie and as long as they didn't include it with the payment, she wasn't going to do a thing…
We did eventually do the thing and complete the adventure. She got to use the governments information network to look for th perfect apple pie.

I heard this one from a friend:

They were all 20th level characters, one of whom happened to be a lich. They were fighting the final boss, who was that guy's lich character. One guy used Wish and wished for the DM to come in and help them. The DM's character said "This is what you were supposed to do with that Wish," and wished the lich out of existence. The lich then used a reaction or something like that to counter-Wish and wish himself back to life, and then used Wish AGAIN to wish the DM out of existence.
It worked.
The DM got up and left the room.
The lich's player sat down in the DM's chair and said "How y'all doing?"
Within three in-game hours, everyone was dead and the world was destroyed.
No one has spoken to the lich's player or the DM in three weeks.

P.S. That lich was also a gnome.

My party was sent on a mission to evict some lizards from the nearby swamp. After 2 days travel, we find signs of their domain. It turns out the lizards were actually Lizardmen. I came up with an epic plan, told the party & small battalion of NPCs that was with us. I, being a rogue, attempted to go wide towards the chieftains but while avoiding the patrol. I forgot to stealth away, so a small group of NPCs followed me. A second patrol spotted us & I ran back towards the flat bottomed raft we came in on. Nat 1, nat 1, nat 20, which resulted in me catching my foot on a fallen log branch, tumbling through the fall back to my feet, then skidding on some moss, which spun me 180 degrees to face backwards, stumbling into reverse rolls & after 6 rolls piercing the back of my skull on a rock. Dead 15 minutes into session 2.

One of my players argued with me for 15 minutes whether or not a crossbow bolt can shut a door.

One of my players argued with me for 15 minutes whether or not a crossbow bolt can shut a door.

Oof…