forum 🔬• ⚛ • Character Science Fair! • ⚛ • 🧪 READ DESC! (CLOSED)

Started February 04, 2022 by @Cadeverek group

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@threesacult

OMG THANKS YOU SO MUCH! imma address some of the things you mentioned!!

• Am I wrong? I thought "no particular reason" meaning it's not just one reason, it's many???? HELP.

• What I meant by "ignores her morals when it comes to the Goddess of Life" is that Eilore is willing to carry out any order she is given but only if she deems it brings her closer to her goals of power. For example, if The Goddess of Life wishes for Eilore to bring a God she deems to be treasonous to her, Eilore will do it even if she knows this will result in The God's death. Another example is that as a form of punishment, Eilore was ordered to raise a child. Eilore hates the idea of motherhood, it has a lot to do with her insecurities about being a better student than a master (her ideas of motherhood are warped obviously because of the goddess of life) and because she feels it will slow her down in her quest for power. She TRIES to follow the orders through, but after raising the kid for 2 years she ended up giving it to another God to raise.

In this way, she is willing to ignore her feelings for the sake of looking good in the goddess's eyes but she does have her limits.

• Oh also about Nyeary! Yes, it is hypocrisy but he also feels its two completely different situations. He deems his laziness as defiance against The Goddess of Life, while he thinks humans have no reason to work because they have all the freedom in the world (obviously not true)

• If you would like more information on Eilore's magic, go to her profile and look under the section titles kilotai! it goes under all aspects of her magic!! Being the Goddess of Life's second-hand woman is not a boost in power per se, mostly because The Goddess of Life stopped training Ariate, Nyaery, and Eilore at the age of 16. Eilore is very powerful because she constantly trains herself to be kept in top shape!

BUT, it does give her access to a lot of information (both about the Goddess of Life and Earth) that no one would know! This makes it very easy for her to manipulate and lie, because a lot of Gods know she holds some of the deepest secrets of Earth. There has been a time when she lies to The God of Wisdom about how The Earth went into a deep slumber just for the sake of keeping others in the dark. She loves the thrill of knowing something they don't.

THANKS YOU SO MUCH FOR THE FEEDBACK OMG IM SO HAPPY

@Ariavaana sorry I am late! Feedback time!
First off, I love your worldbuilding! I do have a question: what is the average human lifespan in your world?
Araite: I love how she just feels like the sun! The pronunciation guides are also very useful.
Eilore: You are so descriptive! I can picture her quite well. I especially like the samples of her dialogue you have!
Nyaery: He's a great character, although I didn't get quite as clear of a picture of him as I did Araite and Eilore. However, it does seem like you have a good idea of what he's like, thr main thing would probably be to make it clearer when explaining to others.
I won't critique the others too much because they're just names. But if they are anything like the others, I have no doubt they'll be fantastic! Thank you for sharing your characters and your world! I don't mean to sound condescending, but have fun as you keep creating!

@Ariavaana I'm glad I could help! Thank you for the explanations, I get what you mean now :) I think adding a little of those explanations to their profiles could definitely help clarify some things! Thanks again for letting me take a look at your characters.

@threesacult BTW I PLAYED AROUND WITHT THAT WEBSITE YOU MENTIONED! Its very cool but I don't wanna start a whole new website for profiles. It gave me an idea though! Thank you :))

@Ariavaana Of course!! And yeah, I completely understand, redoing character profiles on there has been a pain haha

I started mine early because I have somewhere to be, I have a few notes since my universes are kind of a flaming dumpster.

• There are multiple stories per universe. I think that the pages are tagged.
• Most creature pages and about half the location pages are only a name.
• All names are temporary.

That's it, have fun guys.

OMG YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LOOK AT! i choose Ezkah because it sounded cool and your description caught my eye.

• 47 CREATURES?? 47? YOU HAVE A WHOLE ECOSYSTEM AND THAT'S SO COOL! I was browsing through them and my personal favorites were: pseudo bear (because your reasoning is perfect), salty goat (AN AMAZING NAME PLEASE KEEP IT?) and a zipper (also amazing name)

• For your characters, I chose Switchblade because 1, AMAZING NAME! 2, because your description is very funny to me.

• Theres not much on him so really the only thing I can say is add more to his profile! Also why is Mikal allowed to call him by his real name if they are rivals?

• I also looked at Stain and ngl I was surprised she was a girl? Idk the name Stain made me think of a boy (which is fine ofc) Why did she choose that name?

• Why does stain have bad grammar? Is it a lisp of some sort? or maybe her level of education?

• I like the drawing you did for her! The clothes look so good, it was hard to imagine from your description BUT OMG THE ART PULLS IT TOGETHER VERY WELL. I love how you draw clothes!!

I love it all so far, PLEASE TELL ME WHAT A PSEUDO BEAR AND A ZIPPER LOOKS LIKE THEY SOUND SO COOL! @bleh

@Ariavaana

• Yeah I went crazy with the free creatures, I needed some livestock my people wouldn't starve.
• Mikal was friends with Switchblade before he changed his name so that's how he knows the real name.
• Stain wanted to be Stain because stains don't go away and she wasn't planning on doing that either.
• Yes, her bad grammar is because she has no education.
• And thank you. That drawing was very stressful.
• The bear thing is green and black, zippers look sort of like short dogs.

My day started little bit ago, I only just woke up but I made everything public ahead, go at it

Okay @Darkblossom, I mostly looked at Your Celestial Kingdoms universe, and I like it. The magic system is really interesting. I think right now my favorite character is Gavrin, because I love shapeshifters. I'm a little confused as to why the other 2 are both tagged as villains and protagonists but are enemies. Are you writing from both perspectives?

The book is mostly from Lorrehlyl's perspective, a little bit of Rogan's, but when I label people as main characters I do that meaning their importance to the story, not necessarily how much screen-page time they get. Rogan is the antagonist, because he is in direct opposition to Lorrehlyl the viewpoint character, but Lyl is a classical villain and labeled as such, so its a little confusing.

Agh, I am so sorry I missed my time today! I will just put them up now and they'll probably stay up until sometime on Friday. Thank you in advance for the feedback!

@Never-Forget Well, the main critique I have for your pages is that they're not very detailed
I only looked at the characters in the universe Civil War 2, and I like the idea of art as magic, but how does it work?
I also like how you name characters. That's just something I'm not good at, so I found it impressive.
Sorry if this wasn't helpful, I really don't know how to give critiques :l

@bleh Thank you for the feedback!
The Civil War 2 is a story I'm writing with my brother. Basically, if you're skilled enough at something, you can do anything. For this reason, most people become very skilled at only a few things. For instance, someone who draws might become very good at drawing landscapes and could use this power to distort the space into the space s/he drew. If anything is an art form, then it is considered magic. Drawing, painting, calligraphy, creative writing of any sort, cooking, music, dancing, pottery, weaving, scribing, forging, etc. Honestly, other than things like that, I'm still trying to figure it out.