I have a bunch of these stored up so let's yeet these babies out into the world! (feel free to add your own)
- "It smells like dinosaurs in here." "How do you know what dinosaurs smell like? You're not THAT old!" (side note: said this one to my mom and she was really mad, ten out of ten, hysterical)
- "So what's the plan?" "Just run." "Run? We're trying to defeat ancient evil and your plan is to RUN?" "Do you have a better idea?"
- “Mission report number sixteen. The suspect is hiding in the jungle. Could be coming for another jaguar. Best to lay low and keep observ-” “Did you just fart?” “Are you KIDDING me? We’re on the most important mission of the year and you want to know if I FARTED? Honestly, I don’t know why you’re a spy.”
- “So you’re telling me that you can fly?” “I prefer to say that gravity chooses to forget me every now and then.”
OOH I HAVE SOME!!
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"I don't like how that ended. Let's move on and forget that ever happened." "Life doesn't work like that, you know." "It does now."
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"I had a thought." "Oh no." "I swear it's a good one this time!"
-"You are remarkably well behaved tonight…. What did you do?"
-"I hate you!" "Why? I'm lovely!"
-"How the hell am I going to explain this?" "Aliens?" "… Aliens."
-"You cannot hope to defeat me. I've spent months, years planning this, and finally-"
"Ok, sorry to interrupt. Honestly, it sounded good, I'm sure you have a whole speach prepared, but like can you please shut up? I'm trying to fight you!"
"You are nothinf but an incompetent fool! To think, you have the audacity to entertain the thought of possibly defeating me?"
"Oh my god. Does every damn villain feel the need to monologue like some lovechild of a Shakespearean and Bond villain??"
-"Why is he bleeding?" "Because he's an idiot." "I didn't know that idiocy caused people to just start spontaneously bleeding from the nose." "I think it's a new phenomenon."
This is originally from a Tweet, it isn't mine but it's too funny to not share
- "Halt, traveler. You must solve our riddle to continue." "oh no here we go" "One of us only tells the truth. The other only tells LIES." "Geez, Daniel, I said I was sorry!"
"So what's the plan?" Maglo asked.
"Just run." Kirby replied.
"Run? We're trying to defeat ancient evil and your plan is to RUN?"
"Do you have a better idea?"
"Yes! Hell yes! Use the gosh darned magic artifact we spent 5 books piecing together!"
"I kinda forgot we had that….. I like my idea better."
Maglo held his head in his hands and sighed. "Ok, compromise. We run, while holding the Sword of Vicotry and Plot Armor towards it."
"Sounds good! To glorious death!'
"Lord you're an idiot."
"You know it!"
