forum Quick snip of story

Started February 14, 2018 by @JordenMor

tune

Let me know what you think of it. Start of Chapter two)
I awake in my bed, yet again, to the sounds of my parents fighting. They never really seemed to rest with that. How are they still married? They don’t even have the same marker color.
I stared up at the ceiling, rethinking that dream. Why did it feel so real? It was just a dream after all. At least I hope it was a dream. Magic, demons, gods, me in the mix? That couldn’t have been real. Something deep down told me otherwise…

Hmmm…well, it's such a short segment, so I can't judge it that much. However, from what I can tell, it's incredibly cliché. And the thoughts don't flow well. Plus, why would this character think that their dreams are real? That just seems like such a YA trope. I know I sound super mean, but it's hard to critique such a small section. I'll sum it up like this: If I read this in a book, I wouldn't continue reading.