You don't have to do this if you don't want to because it's got a lot but here's a character
https://toyhou.se/1679184.mara
Okay, so what I'm noticing is there are spots that don't fit well together. If the character would be aggressive, it wouldn't make sense for them to be emotionless.
hey could you look at this character for me?
One of the things that caught my eye was the weight. Is he supposed to be underweight? If not, he should be a bit heavier than he is currently. Not chubbier, per say, but meeting a normal weight for his height.
You don't have to do this if you don't want to because it's got a lot but here's a character
https://toyhou.se/1679184.maraOkay, so what I'm noticing is there are spots that don't fit well together. If the character would be aggressive, it wouldn't make sense for them to be emotionless.
That's sort of the point of the character and the species as a whole. They don't feel but they still react. And just because you're emotionless doesn't mean you can't have a personality. They need to be something I can't just make them a shell. Especially for a main character.
I get this a lot despite trying really hard to show people what I mean but also integrating it into the profile without it sounding like I'm just dumping information on you.
I was hoping it would be more obvious that this character is conflicted and being a hybrid only puts a stopper on feeling but not actually being a person.
Could you critique my character Rie? Here's the link; Rie Katayama
You don't have to do this if you don't want to because it's got a lot but here's a character
https://toyhou.se/1679184.maraOkay, so what I'm noticing is there are spots that don't fit well together. If the character would be aggressive, it wouldn't make sense for them to be emotionless.
That's sort of the point of the character and the species as a whole. They don't feel but they still react. And just because you're emotionless doesn't mean you can't have a personality. They need to be something I can't just make them a shell. Especially for a main character.
I get this a lot despite trying really hard to show people what I mean but also integrating it into the profile without it sounding like I'm just dumping information on you.
I was hoping it would be more obvious that this character is conflicted and being a hybrid only puts a stopper on feeling but not actually being a person.
I know it's been forever since I've looked at this, but I would find a different way to describe this. Maybe describe them as cold instead, so it gets the point across while also making sense to the reader.
Could you critique my character Rie? Here's the link; Rie Katayama
Hi! Sorry it took me almost 3 months to get to this, but I finally did! I read through everything, and I love how much detail and thought you put into the character. I would like to ask the content that the character is being used in, due to how much there is to pick up on.
Rie is going to be used in a fantasy setting. I'm still working on how to expose the reader to her complex background, but thanks for the critique!
Rie is going to be used in a fantasy setting. I'm still working on how to expose the reader to her complex background, but thanks for the critique!
I think if you create well developed base to put her in, everything should fall into place!
Could you critique my character Nova? I worked really hard on her and I think I did well, thank youuuu~