forum I feel like I should be helping somehow
Started by @ThatBackgroundSlytherin
tune

people_alt 6 followers

@ThatBackgroundSlytherin

Absolutely!

Looks
Not much complaint here. This is just a thing I do, but I usually put where the character's ancestors are from in the Race area. Black doesn't really tell me much.

Nature
I love her nature! It's very descriptive. One thing I did notice was that all of her talents are combat based. What else is she good at? Can she make an origami crane? Can she bake a mean pie? Is she skilled at hand crafts? Or are her fine motor skills a little out of wack? You fleshed some of that out in the hobbies section but there's still some to be desired.

Social
This area was pretty clean. One thing is, why did she suddenly lose faith after her husband's death? Did it linger on then dwindle? Or was it just a sudden slam? Her favorite food was kind of sketchy as you didn't give a specific one. Is it fruit or chocolate?

History
This was great! Her education was really descriptive and solid, and her backstory was in depth. One thing is it kind of jolts to a halt. There wasn't a description for how she reacted or what she did after her husband dies. Does the story take place two minutes after her husband's death? If so, then it's fine.

Hope this helps! I really enjoyed reading it.

@WriteOutofTime

Thank you!! That's really helpful. The story starts…yeah, about two minutes after his death. Kinda. It's a prologue, and then the story starts. Anyways thanks again fren! :D