forum Could someone edit my little poem?-I was bored

Started January 10, 2019 by @Musical_Queen

tune

Help

SURE!

Everyday, a young boy jumps off of the bus running home.
He ignores the laughs that his peers give him
But they didn’t know what was happening
They didn’t know why he ran
For what purpose
Who he ran for

Everyday, the young boy would run home
Hoping, praying, pleading
Begging that if someone was there
If there was a god of some sort
That his sister hadn’t killed herself
While he was at school

He accepted the laughs
He let them taunt him
He didn’t care
He would take it all
And a thousand time more
If it meant his sister was alive

Nobody knew what he went through
So he ran as fast as he could
He ran
He ran as if it were the last time he would see her
Nobody knew where he went
Why he did what he did

A week later, he stopped running

Oh wow, that's really moving. I honestly don't think there is anything I can critique, it's beautifully written.

That's so sweet and sad ;-; My heart

Thank you, this is the first thing I've ever posted online and it was also one of my first poems, so that means so much to me. Thank you

You are very welcome my dear.

You’re welcome! ❤️