forum Character critique anyone?

Started March 24, 2020 by @stexyph

tune

I haven't really critiqued many characters but I'll try.

Looks
This section is pretty good. My only suggestion is to specify the colors. You say her hair is brown but what shade? You could also specify her skin tone, it's tan but you could add what undertones she has or if her skin is a warm tone or a cooler tone.

Nature
First off, the prejuidice section could use some explaining. You should explain why she's not fond of republicans. Second, her personality section is a bit vague and some traits are a bit contradictory. You say she is layed back and agressive but those two traits are opposites. I think I get what you're trying to express about her but again, you should go more in depth if you're gonna have contradictions in her personality.

Social
You mentioned before that she goes to an Airforce Academy and she wants to be a pilot but you say she doesn't care much about politics. I think someone who wants to join the airforce would care about politics since their fighting for their country.

History
This section is also good. The only thing I would recommend is to maybe talk a bit more on Brennan. Explain her relationship with her friends, her brother, and their dad's friends. You could also talk about how she feels about things and events that have happened in her life.

Overall, Brennan is a pretty likeable character and I enjoyed reading about her. She seems well thought out and I really liked the detail you gave. Asides from explaining things a bit more, I think she's pretty good.

Hey! Thank you for your critique. I wasn't expecting anybody to but this is amazing thanks!

Looks: I'll go back and change some things. You're right, wasn't very specific with the skin tone or hair for that matter.

Nature: It's where she grew up. Her dad was a republican, but he was mean, didn't have upstanding morals. This made her believe that all Republicans were like her dad, so she has a strong dislike but typically doesn't make it obvious. She's a very contradictory character for personality. She just kinda changes with whoever she's with. It all depends ho she feels. one day, she'd be okay going along with whatever, the next day, she wants to be the one making decisions. She used to be really disagreeable, but when she got older realized that it doesn't rub off well on other people and tried to hide that side of her more. However, now she fluctuates. I don't think she has any kind of mental illness, she's just very fluent in her personality. I don't know how to put, it's confusing, I'll fix it.

Social: She doesn't have an interest much in politics. She just wants to fight for her country. Sure, she watches news every now and then and she knows she's not a republican, but she doesn't actively hound it. I get it though, kinda confusing ad I'll try to switch that around.

History: I'll go back and add some more detail on that.

Thanks again for the critique!

No problem!