Ebony yelped as the glass was taken out of her hand, jumping back. It was the last thing she had been expecting from him. She was looking at him with something mixed with horror and anger. She stood there long after he left, unable to move. Her mind was a mess of things. Eventually, she walked to the window and looked down, seeing one of her maids cleaning up the glass. She wasn't sure if anyone gave the order but she was glad it was at least getting cleaned up. They didn't need anyone hurting themselves on the glass.
As she looked around her room, she realized he had tossed out the last bottle she had in her room. She walked to the door and twisted the handle, only to find the door was locked. He had locked her in there. She wasn't entirely sure how he did it. There wasn't a lock on the outside of the door. He must of barricaded her in.
She banged on the door, yelling obscenities, demanding to be let out.
She was trapped.
She was trapped.
She felt her heart rate accelerate. She didn't do well when she was confined.
At some point during the night, her legs had given out on her. She was a trembling mess. Even though it had only been a few short hours since her last drink, her body was going through withdrawals. She hadn't gone this long without a drink in months. Her stomach was turning in circles, the nausea building. She had to crawl to the bathroom, as she couldn't stand. She barely made it to the toilet before she vomited what little was left in her stomach. She curled up on the cold bathroom floor as the tremors racked her body.
She found no sleep in the night.
Only terrible visions and hallucinations plagued her the later the night became and the longer she went without even a drop of alcohol.
(oh. Oops. I thought she had locked the door, and he just pulled it closed behind him. didn't mean to do that XP poor dear)
(Ohhhh lol. Do u want me to change it?)
Uriah was fairly certain she had locked the door from inside. He found her screaming and yelling odd, but it was likely just more erratic behavior.
Eventually, she quieted, and he hoped she'd gone to sleep. Maybe drunk herself back to rest.
He stood guard the entire evening, not bothering to sleep. Some small part of him felt bad about the look on her face when he'd slapped the glass away, but. It was worth it to express his disdain for her awful coping mechanism.
The morning came, and he knocked on her door. When she didn't respond, he tried to open the door, but it wouldn't open. However, the handle wasn't stuck in the locked position. It would turn, but the door wouldn't open.
He groand as he realized he'd likely shut the door too hard, and had jammed it somehow. Her cursing and shouting last night took on new meaning.
She thinks I locked her in.
Well. That was unfortunate, but she obviously didn't consider him enough of a friend for it to matter to her too much.
He kicked the door in, his armored foot snapping the door loose, and it swung wide on its hinges, hitting the far wall with a bang.
"Countess Morgan?"
(no it's fine. I mean, that's awful for her, but I think I made it work)
As the night passed on and dawn came, Ebony did not move from her spot on the floor. She was covered in her own sweat and bile, as she hadn't had the strength to sit up for the toilet. She was shivering as if the air had turned below freezing, despite it being quite a comfortable temperature inside. Her eyes had shut but she had not slept. She had shut her eyes to escape the haunting faces of her parents, her brothers, and her sisters, burning and broken. It did not help.
They only followed her into her mind. Her hands were clamped on her ears. She could hear the screaming as people burned alive, as they were cut down by invaders. Faces flashed in her head, haunting her. They were haunting her.
She had scratches on her arms and chest but her own doing. It was like she was trying to claw something out of her skin. Specs of blood were long dried on her skin. Her nails hadn't been sharp enough to cause deep wounds.
Uriah found her in the bathroom, on the floor, curled in on herself and scratched up. He knelt next to her, knowing full well there was no easy way to do what he was about to have to do.
"Countess, wake up." He shook her shoulder, before grabbing the pitcher of cool water from near the basin and pouring the entire thing over her head.
He might have tried to be careful and caring before, but. A, she was going to come awake screaming and raving regardless of how he did this, and B?
She'd pointedly told him to shove off last night. No need to try to show more gentleness when she clearly considered herself above that.
They were employer and employee, and he was doing his job. Waking her and getting her ready for her day.
Not coddling a friend out of an awful night. She'd said no to that.
Ebony had heard someone enter the bathroom but she did not move. Her own mind had twisted her reality. She did not hear her guard, she heard the usurper, coming to kill her at last. She tried playing dead, hoping it would send him away. That didn't work. Water was dumped on her head, a sure tactic to scare and torture her.
It worked.
She was up in a start, pushing herself against the wall. She trembled from fear and withdrawals. She was whimpering, trying to cover herself. Perhaps if she looked smaller, he would leave her alone.
"No please, don't hurt me." She spoke like a child, like she was her nine year old self again. "Please, please, don't kill me. I'll dissappear. You won't ever hear about me again."
She was a bit gross, and Uriah couldn't exactly bathe her, particularly not with her current state of mind. But he could get her heading that way.
He refilled the pitcher from the pump in the far corner, and splashed her again. Either the water would snap her out of it, or she'd come out of her mental breakdown slowly, as he didn't kill her.
Either way, he had a job to do.
"Countess, you need to get cleaned up and ready. If you'll step into your rooms, I can have the maids draw you a bath." He stepped over and wrapped a towel around her shaking shoulders, ignoring her pleas. This wasn't the first time she'd woken up hungover, or even still drunk, and had come straight out pf a nightmare and begun talking nonsense and gibberish.
He tugged the towel gently, guiding her out of the bathroom and into her room, where he stopped moving her and let her land where she would. He leaned out the door and called in a couple of servants to draw a warm bath, and they began to do so.
Uriah waited while they did, just watching her. Some part of him wanted to try to be gentle to her. To try to coax her out of this state with kindness.
And the rest of him had already tried it, for months, and had gotten nowhere.
She wanted to be stiff, unfriendly, unyielding? Alright then. That was how this would go.
It took Ebony longer than usual to come out of her nightmare. When her eyes finally focused, she found herself sitting on her bed, soaked in water, with a towel around her. Her body was still shaking, from the cold and her withdrawals. Her stomach was still turning but there was nothing left in her to come out.
She clattered and voices but she had tuned it all out. She was staring at the floor. Everything hurt. Her body ached, her head was pounding, every breath felt like blades cutting her lungs. She didn't trust her legs. They felt like jello.
She wanted to crawl into a hole and die. She slowly laid down on the bed. Her eyes welled with tears and the streaked down her cheeks. She needed wine. She needed a glass. She wanted to die.
The servants drew up a hot bath, and Uriah shooed them out after. He stepped over to the Countess, and pulled her upright by pulling on the towel around her shoulders.
"Milady, your bath is ready. It would be in our best interest to sweat out the shakes in your system."
He wasn't sure if she would move under her own power or not, so he lifted her up off the bed and carried her into the bathroom, where he desosited her in the bath. The guard wasn't really sure that stripping her would be the best move just now, so he left her clothed as he lowered her into the steaming water. It wasn't hot enough to scald, but it was definitely hot enough to clean. There was already soap mixed into the water, so even if all she did was sit there, she'd emerge cleaner than she went in.
He stepped back out the door, and gave her some privacy.
Ebony was barely able to hook an arm around his neck as he lifted her up. Her stomach rolled and it was a small mercy she didn't vomit. Not that there was anything to vomit other than stomach acid.
She hasn't been expecting to be placed fully clothed in the bath. She wouldn't have been able to remove her dress herself and she wasn't in any state to ask anything of Uriah. The water was warm, soothing her aching muscles and causing her open wounds to sting. She curled into herself, tucking her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around herself.
A broken noise left her lips as Uriah stepped back and made to leave. It didn't matter what terms they were on, she didn't want to be left alone.
"Don't go. Please." She croaked. Her voice was hoarse from hours of screaming and vomiting. She needed water and a hot tea to soothe the ache.
Uriah paused, one foot already out.
Employer, employee.
"You're literally bathing, Countess, this is no place for me. I'll be right outside the door should you need anything. I can have one of the maids come and help you, should you so desire."
On the one hand, regardless of their status, he likely shouldn't be around her mostly undressed and soaking wet. Not a good combination.
And on the other hand, she'd made it clear what she thought about them and… intimate situations. This qualified, and he wasn't going to use her weakened state to his advantage. That would be just plain wrong, regardless of the situation.
He stood in the doorway, facing away, so that she wasn't entirely alone, but also so that she would have some privacy.
The day was getting on, and his mind was already on the trip they needed to take. They'd be expected at the Palace by this afternoon, with the party to officially start this evening.
He'd need to make sure she was in her right mind by then, or the Palace would be even more dangerous for her than it was already going to be.
Ebony reached behind her to pull at the buttons on the back of her dress to no avail. Hee shaking fingers couldn't undo a single one and even if she was able, she wouldn't have been able to unbutton the full of the gown. She didn't want to call on a maid. She didn't want anyone else to see her like this. She did have a bit of pride left, not much, but a small piece of it.
She soon gave up on her gown and started to unravel her hair out of the braid it had been in. She winced at the pain her scalp was in, caused by the tight braid pulling on her hair day and night. Her hands placed the pins on the side of the tub. She dipped her head back, fully submerging her hair.
She didn't feel any better. She likely wouldn't until she had at least a sip of wine to soothe the war raging inside of her. She understood she had let it get out of hand. She recognized that much. She should not had let herself get drunk almost every night. She could fix that while at the palace. She would need a sharp mind, anyhow. She would have to watch how much she consumed. No more than four glasses a day. One in the morning, one at lunch, one at dinner, and one before bed. It would be much different than the bottle she had a day now but she could adjust. She would have too.
Uriah waited as Lady Ebony soaked in the hot water. She seemed to come to herself eventually, slowly getting a grip on reality and moving forward.
He moved to lay out the clothes she'd picked a few days prior for the ride up. They needed to get going soon. He was packed and ready, and Nurl was already saddled and had the packs on his back. Lorcan was in the process of being loaded up.
After a while, Uriah resumed his spot at the door of the bathroom, clearing his throat.
"Countess Morgan, we need to keep moving forward. The Palace awaits." It was the politest way he knew how to say hurry up.
Ebony was at last able to peel the dress from her body. She pulled the dress off and left it sitting at the bottom of the tub. She barely acknowledged her sworn knight besides standing up in the tub, as naked as the day she was born, and stepping out of it. While nudity was something she wasn't ashamed of, she found she didn't care about what she looked like in the presence of Uriah.
She wrung the water out if her hair and pulled a towel around herself to dry off. She could care less about the palace waiting for her. She doubted the king would even notice her absecence but there was only so much risk she was willing to take, for the sake of her kids. She found her riding clothing and pulled them on. She wrapped a binding around her chest for support. She pulled on leather trousers that had since become loose on her during her stay. She chucked on a tunic before grabbing her riding boots. She pulled them on and laced up the boots. Her fingers fumbled the first few times trying to tie the bow.
She used her towel to soak up the last bit of water in her hair. It was damp, still, but it would be alright as long as she kept it off of her neck. She sat at her vanity to comb through her hair and braid it. She wrapped the Baird around the crown of her head and pinned it in place. She avoided looking at the mirror longer than necessary and she refused to focus on her face. She didn't want to know what she looked like. She didn't want to see her pale skin, the lifelessness in her face. She didn't want to see the dark circles under eyes. She didn't want to see the hollowness.
She wasn't ready to acknowledge that she had hit rock bottom. Her depression had seemed to sneak in and take over. She used drinking to cope. Perhaps there were worse ways to cope. She could hurt herself physically, she could take an assortment of drugs. She was stuck in her head, stuck in past, and she couldn't escape. She was falling in the dark and there was no sign of light. There was nothing to pull her out. The only thing that kept her going were the children in her care.
"Draw up adoption papers for Teben. I want to sign them and finalize them before we leave. No one else is going to adopt the child and we've already made all of the necessary accommodations. There's no point in moving hom to a different home."
(again, repeat my apology for the long wait)
Uriah kept his eyes down as Lady Ebony stepped out and dressed. He wasn't here to gawk, and he also knew that she wasn't proud of her appearance at the moment.
He knew full well that her time in the Palace wouldn't make her feel better, but… perhaps…
Maybe there will be someone there she can ensnare. It wasn't a thought he was proud of, but… courtiers were known for bedding each other, and if she needed a fix… The Palace would be the place to find it.
If I can get her there in one piece.
He acknowledged the orders about Teben, and moved to her office. He'd already drawn up the boy's papers, but the names of the adoptive parent was blank. He filled in Lady Ebony and set the quill and ink near the page.
"Paper's are ready, Milady." He kept his voice gentle, respectful. The last day had clearly been rocky, he knew it had, but he wasn't trying to perpetuate that.
