forum You do not know how long I have waited for you //OxO//Closed

Started November 11, 2021 by @knightinadream group

tune

The silence that hung between them made him feel anxious. All it did was make his nerves even more jittery despite his efforts. Did he do something wrong? Was it something that he had just said? Or does Her Majesty think poorly of him? Everything that he had said just poured out from his heart; it was difficult to control it.

And yet, she smiled. She, the queen, was smiling at him. Myron did not know what else to do aside from staring back at her and softly grinning. There is something about her smile that makes him happy. He enjoyed it, thankful that his eyes were able to see such a thing.

A few seconds after Queen Tessa got up, he immediately stood. From what he recalls correctly, one of the rules was to stand if the queen was. Though he got up, he froze in place right after. His hands were crossed in front of him. Lowering his chin, he quickly adjusted his scarf once again.

He nodded at her words. "Yes, Your Majesty." After pushing the chair in, he followed after her. While she spoke, he took in every single word and made sure he made important note of things that will be helpful for him as well as her.

For a brief moment, he got distracted by the stained glass of the doors. The way light casts through them makes it so pleasing to see. Hearing the queen's question made him snap back into his senses, though he was curious by the tone in her voice. Myron gave a simple head bow before walking over to Queen Tessa's side.

(Sorry about the length, if that’s at all a problem)

As her thoughts whirled, Yethesa noticed his smile. It brought comfort to her, and helped influence her decision to tell him of her nightmares. Seeing him smile, after being apart so long, meant the world to her.

When Myron stood up, she noted his freeze. It would definitely be strange for him, transitioning from a soldier in the field to a bodyguard in the palace. Maybe she could give him some pointers, so it wouldn’t be so stressful on him.

Yethesa appreciated his attentiveness during her explanation of the layout. She didn’t doubt for a moment that he could find his way through her chambers.

When she glanced over her shoulder, she noticed his gaze on the stained glass and couldn’t help a small smile. He saw the beauty in the doors. Did he find her beautiful, she wondered.

As he approached, she turned to look out over the city below, and the land stretching out beyond the walls. Yethesa loved the view. It was breathtaking, especially when the sun set. It took her a moment to refocus on the situation, and she looked at Myron.

“I want to clarify my glance at my chamber door earlier. I… have been dealing with something for years now, and I have told absolutely no one about it. I didn’t want the guards posted at my door to overhear and worry,”Yethesa began.

She was completely improvising with her story, but she had a basic idea of where she wanted to go with it. She only hoped she didn’t scare Myron away with it.

“I don’t know why I never told anyone before, but I truly appreciated your earlier words, and I want to be honest regarding why. I have strange dreams, nightmares even. I can never truly decipher them, and sometimes I don’t even remember what they were, but… some terrify me, while others leave me in tears,”she explained shakily.

Yethesa sighed, taking a deep breath to steady herself. She hadn’t lied about her nightmares, except for her ability to decipher them. She knew exactly what they were, and why, but Myron didn’t need to know that just yet.

While he ambled over, his eyes focused on the land that was below him. The view was just as, if not more than, the stained glass. Everything seemed to be small from here and yet, he had rode through the city roads not too long ago. Looking up, there were some clouds softly gliding by as the sun just stood there.

Myron felt his heart become fuzzy when he took a glimpse at Queen Tessa. The way her eyes looked as she looked at the view is so mesmerizing in itself. Although, he felt as if he let his eyes linger for longer than they should. When the queen looked at him, he lowered his chin to the ground for a moment.

Originally, he did not think of much when she looked back at the door. Of course, he was worried if there was something going on. Yet with her words, he was not sure what to expect. Lifting his chin, Myron stared at the queen, waiting to hear what it is.

His eyes widened a little while he listened to the queen. She has strange dreams too? What are they like? Does she see him in them? Funny how such a thing is happening, but he does worry about the queen. With the way he is with the nightmares and everything, he wondered what it is like for her. Hopefully he is able to help her and make it somewhat better if possible.

Gradually, his hand reached out to her, but soon recoiled back. It was always a habit for him to comfort someone whether it was by patting them or just by resting his hand on them. He knew that he should not rest his hand on the queen, though he wishes to console and assure her.

"I am honored that you are telling me this, Your Majesty. You do not have to suffer alone or fear of others' worry. Even if it is just a dream that is bothering you, I will be there at your side," He promised. "If I may be honest, I tend to go through the same thing. Every now and then I have a strange dream that leaves me waking up in a panic, but it is terrible and I do not wish for you to go through such a thing on your own. Please, my queen, do not suffer this on your own."

As she started to speak, Yethesa saw his downward look and wondered why he was doing that. Had he noticed something on the ground? Was he embarrassed by something? Maybe being shy because he might have watched her gaze out at the city? She didn’t know.

Yethesa noticed his eyes widen as she revealed her nightmares. There was more than just surprise there. It was recognition, she was certain of it. He had nightmares of his own. Oh, the poor man, plagued by dreams that he likely didn’t understand!

His hand reached out, then recoiled. She stifled a moan and slid her hand slightly along the railing, moving it a tiny bit closer to him. She understood that he was trying to be proper, but, at that moment, he could throw propriety to the wind and she wouldn’t care. With the nightmarish memories of her youth in her mind, she needed the comfort.

She looked at him again when he spoke, appreciating his words. Her eyes then widened at his admission. She could guess what it was that haunted his dreams, and it was likely the same thing that haunted hers.

“Thank you, truly. I still do not know why I’ve been so afraid to mention it all these years. And, it’s horrible that you must deal with such dreams as well, but, in a strange and even twisted way, it comforts me. I’ve never known anyone else who understood what it is like,”she said.

His hand reached down, sitting on top of the railing. In the corner of his eye, he noticed that the queen had hers on the railing too, but he did not think much about it at the moment. Myron was too focused on the queen, too focused on her and her well-being. The oddities of the nightmares they both share is looming around his mind.

Deep down, there is feeling of wanting to set his hand on top of hers, but he doesn't know why. What kind of scares him is that the feeling is natural. The idea of touching, holding the Queen's hand is natural to his mind. Initially, he wanted to, but only out of the reason to console her. It is a habit for him, though he knows that he must fulfill the rules as a subject and as the queen's personal bodyguard.

When she glanced back at him again, he took note of the way her eyes lit up. A shiver ran down his spine. He straightened himself more from the sudden sensation. The fact that they share similar experiences with dreams is terrible for each other, and yet, it is oddly comforting. Even though, he is more concerned about her having the nightmares and strange dreams.

Turning to face her, he switched hands on the railing. "Your Majesty, sometimes the strongest thing we can do is to admit fears that we hold true to ourselves," He stated. "Let us both not worry about these dreams or what they mean. We will face them on together, if that is something you desire."

He looked down at the floor while biting his bottom lip. A few moments had passed until he gazed back at the queen. "If I may be honest, all my life I never expected to share the same kind of nightmares with someone like you, Your Majesy," He said. "Though it worries me. I do not know want you to go through such pain and sleepless nights. A queen such as yourself should never have to go through something like this."

Yethesa noticed Myron straighten and she wondered why. Was it what she had said? Did she spook him? No, he didn’t seem spooked… quite the opposite in fact. She couldn’t be too sure what he was feeling, but she truly wondered if he felt the same way about her as she did to him. Their old love rekindled. Could that be more than just a dream?

She smiled softly at his words, taking comfort in them. How she had missed his wise words, his soothing voice.

“I would greatly appreciate that,”Yethesa replied.

She watched him, noting his look. She struggled not to giggle. He looked so sweet when he bit his lip. She barely managed to compose herself as he looked up.

“I never expected another to know these nightmares either. And it gladdens me to know that you have such concern for me, but…”Yethesa paused, sighing as she turned away.

“I don’t know. Sometimes I feel… like I deserve them. I… years ago…”Yethesa trailed off, her hand clenching the railing as the other moved up to cover her mouth. She closed her eyes, fighting tears as she relived that horrible night, the one that had left her cursed and alone.

Admist all the thoughts occurring in his mind, he took a moment to appreciate the queen's smile. He sighed at the sight of it. The color of his cheeks turned in to an off shade of pink and red. When a few seconds passed by, he turned his head to glance up at the sky while nodding at her words.

The smile he saw had soon faded away as she spoke again. Myron looked at Her Majesty before she turned facing the other direction. Hers words concerned him. They were confusing. Just by the way he saw her now, he could tell that she is not well.

He walked over so they could face each other without her moving. Still maintaining a few steps distance, he sat his hand on top of the railing again. His heart sank to the bottom of his chest seeing as Queen Tessa was trying to fight back tears.

"Why? Why do you believe that you deserve them, my queen?" He asked softly. It does not make any sense to him. On the other hand, he is not sure why he has them, but it doesn't really make sense for anyone to have such reoccurring nightmares. The pain it brings….No one should have to go through it.

Myron rested his right hand on top of hers. Even though his heart was telling him to hug her, it was the best he could do. He does not wish to give Queen Tessa the wrong impression nor does he want to do the same with anyone else. Nevertheless, he still feels that he should be doing something. Whether that be something as simple as holding the queen's hand or smiling, he should not just stand and watch.

"Forgive me for my hand, Your Majesty, but I do not wish to see you like this without my being able to do something for you….To aid you in reassurance."

Yethesa barely registered Myron’s movements as she fought and failed to escape those horrible memories. She had killed him, her beloved, the man she had given her heart, and her soul, to. And now Myron stood beside her, the body of her beloved but not the mind. It was hopeless, a futile grasp at forgiveness that she likely would never get. She was doomed to her eternal misery, and why shouldn’t she be? She had gone through with the act, after all!

Myron’s questions pulled Yethesa somewhat out the black depths of her tormented mind. She glanced at him.

“Guilt. So much guilt. I can never forgive myself for the things I’ve done. And, this was all before I met Queen Loreena,”Yethesa answered, tears starting to stream down her face.

The moment Myron’s hand rested on hers, Yethesa realized just how much she needed the comfort, especially from him. She needed him to hold her and tell her everything would be alright, that she was forgiven for all that she had done to him. Unfortunately, she still doubted she would ever be forgiven, but she didn’t care at that moment.

Nor did she much care about propriety then. They were alone, and far enough above the city to be of little concern to the citizens below. Yethesa nodded in acknowledgment to his apology, then turned and wrapped Myron in a hug, her tears finally bursting forth in a full fit of crying.

“You’re forgiven, though I hope you’ll forgive me for this,”she replied to his apology through her tears.

As she cried, Misty trotted out onto the balcony, rubbing against both of their legs in her own attempt to comfort Yethesa. She also started to loudly purr, meowing and cooing periodically.

What things had she done to deserve such a thing? He wanted to speak again, but he knew that question would fall from his tongue; it is not his place to ask such a question. Really, it is not his place to do most of the things he has already done.

Seeing the tears in her eyes that began to roll down her cheeks felt like something was piercing his heart. Myron knew his hand was itching to reach out and wipe away the tears, but it stayed at his side. The other still rested on top of the queen's.

His focus lingered on their hands, leaving him surprised when he felt Her Majesty wrap her arms around him. The feeling was overwhelming. It was welcoming, as if he had hugged the queen before. His ears shot with warmth while a tingling sensation rose in his chest. When was the last thing he had ever hugged anyone? He could not even recall the last time.

Slowly yet surely, he wrapped his arms around her. With his one hand, he gently brushed her back for comfort. His eyes scanned their surrounding area before looking down at the top of her head. "I appreciate your apology, my queen," He whispered. "Although you do not have to be sorry. I am a bodyguard and I suppose I should be protecting your heart as well, no?"

He chuckled a little then glanced down at the cat. Gradually, he tightened his embrace. "Take all the time that you need, Your Majesty. I will be here for you."

She barely registered Myron’s arms wrapping around her as she cried. Though, she did notice when he rubbed her back. Memories of the many times her beloved had done that returned, and it was such a relief to feel it again.

Yethesa listened to him, appreciating the soft sound of his voice. She then snickered a bit at his question. Oh, if only you knew.

After a moment, Yethesa noticed his tightening embrace and she tightened her arms around him in reply. She gave a little laugh at his words, grateful to hear them. A moment later, she finally noticed Misty, snickering again.

As Yethesa started to calm down, she realized that she would have to let go of Myron at some point. It was necessary, but she didn’t want to at all. She felt so safe and warm in his arms, like returning to a welcoming home after years of being away. She didn’t want that to end.

Yethesa, as she had expected, hesitated to let go of Myron once she had calmed down. After a long moment passed, she finally, reluctantly, untangled from him and took a couple steps back. She wiped her face and took a few deep breaths to compose herself, smiling at Misty, who was sitting next to Myron, staring at her with big, happy eyes as she kneaded the ground. Yethesa then looked at Myron.

“Thank you. I’m sorry for abruptly hugging you like that, but… I really needed it,”she said. Yethesa then started to chuckle, her cheeks turning a bit red.

“This has been such an unusual meeting, hasn’t it? By now, the guards at the door are probably wondering what’s going on, and… I honestly don’t know what to do. Goodness,”she commented, shaking her head and continuing to chuckle.

It all feels so familiar to him. Myron was not able to figure out what was so calming about hugging the queen. The whole idea is scary to him actually, and yet, he really did not care. What was even scarier to him was the images that flashed in his mind. He saw himself hugging someone, but at the same time, it wasn't him. Same face but different clothes.

He blinked. That wasn't him and that wasn't the queen. He is sure of it. He knows. On the other hand, his heart thumped. It beated differently for a second. His worry started to bloom until he heard the queen laughing a little.

At least she was beginning to feel better now. It was surprising to him when she had let go. A light feeling in his chest arose, but he did not say anything. In the corner of his eye, he noticed Misty next to him. The corners of his lips rose as he tried his best suppressing a laugh.

With his hands held in front of him, he glanced over at the queen then bowed. "I appreciate your apology, Your Majesty, but you do not have to be sorry for something that you needed at the moment." A couple strands of hair fell in front of his eyes, but his focus was fixated on the redness of the queen's cheeks. Somehow, for some reason, he could not get over them. How sweet….

A soft chuckle managed to escape from his lips. "It is alright, my queen," He reassured. "Whatever the guards are thinking should not be of concern, though we could go back if you so choose to do so. We could also stay out here for a moment too. I believe whatever you decision you make, my queen, that it will be a good one."

Yethesa noticed the start of a grin on Myron’s face as he saw Misty. She was glad she was already chuckling, because she could continue to do so without him necessarily noticing the added reason.

She then saw his bow and listened to him, grateful that he was so accepting. When the strands of hair fell, Yethesa had a hard time containing a grin. She loved the way it made him look, she truly did, even though she couldn’t really describe why.

Yethesa smiled a bit at his words, then hummed in thought. For propriety’s sake, it was probably best to return inside, but she was truly enjoying her time with Myron, excluding the crying fit, though she did like the hug. Yethesa glanced inside indecisively, then turned to look over the balcony, and for a moment she became lost in the gorgeous view.

“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt if we stayed out here a bit longer. The view is just so beautiful right now,”she finally decided.

Yethesa moved to lean against the railing, staring out into the distance, quickly relaxing. There was something so calming about being on the balcony, and Myron and Misty’s presence seemed to double, even triple, that soothing effect.

Lowering his chin, he gave her a subtle nod. "As you wish, my queen." Myron bit the inside of his lip, thinking that it would help stop himself from saying more. Yes the view is beautiful, but his eyes were not looking at the area surrounding them. They were not gazing up at the sky or down at the capital below. No. Instead, they were glued to the queen.

It was difficult to move. While his eyes were stuck to her, it felt as if his feet were stuck in mud. Very slowly did he move back to his previous spot. Even if it was just the two of them, he still had to follow all the rules and maintain some sort of distance from the queen. Of course he did just break that rule, and yet, it seems like it was nothing. At least Her Majesty is better now, that is all that matters to him.

He shook his head. Oh heavens he does not know what is going on with him. Sure he has experienced strange things all his life, but he cannot be strange right now. Having his eyes linger on her is something he shouldn't even be considering. There was a slight irritated feeling where is scar is, but he ignored it after adjusting his scarf.

The silence was peaceful, although he was a bit concerned about Her Majesty. Myron leaned to the left in order to try to catch a glimpse. Standing up straight, a small sigh left his lips. For a moment, he looked down at Misty, but his eyes ended up wandering back at her. "Excuse me, Your Majesty, but are you alright? Do you need anything?"

(Just so you know, I updated Yethesa’s template to include the names of the pets [and specified what a couple are] and also of her predecessor. I didn’t change anything besides that. I’m sometimes bad at remembering names, so that’s why I did it)

As Yethesa gazed at the beauty before her, she sensed that she was being watched. Was Myron staring at her? Was he being protective, or was it something else? Did she dare hope to think that Myron would look at her like his past self did?

Yethesa, despite the abundance of questions in her mind, didn’t outwardly react to his stare. She continued to admire the landscape, seemingly oblivious to Myron.

She watched out of the corner of her eye as Myron slowly moved. She respected his diligence in being modest, even after technically breaking the distancing rule only minutes ago. Though, Yethesa didn’t really consider the hug a break in propriety at all, since she had truly needed the comfort.

Yethesa then noticed Myron shaking his head, then adjusting his scarf. Was he just scolding himself, or was there something more going on?

When Myron leaned over, she gave him an inquisitive side-glance. When he spoke, Yethesa realized why he had been leaning, and also figured out part of what he had been thinking. She turned to look at him with a soft smile.

“Yes, I am alright. Much better than I have been in a while actually. Thank you, Captain Chilikov,”Yethesa answered.

She realized that this was the first time she had actually spoken his name, and inwardly scolded herself for that. Yethesa didn’t know why she had been so hesitant to say his name, but, on the bright side, it did seem to hold greater weight now than it would have if she had been saying his name all this time.

Misty came walking up after a moment, meowing and rubbing Yethesa’s leg. She smiled and bent down to pet her, then picked her up, stepping a bit back from the railing to be safe. Misty immediately started to purr very loud. And her begging actually reminded Yethesa of something.

“Goodness, I completely forgot to introduce you to the rest of my pets. Do you want to see them? I’m a bit of an animal lover, if that wasn’t already obvious,”Yethesa asked, chuckling as Misty leaned more into her.

(Oh it's all good. Thanks for telling me!)

Much better than I have been in a while…… What does she mean by that? Yes, he is happy that she is better, but her words are hiding something. At least, that is what Myron is sensing. Whatever little bit of peace he had gotten was fading away and slowly turning into worry. He wants to ask questions. So many questions.

His cheeks flushed red the moment he heard the queen call him by his name, well his last name at least. Would it be possible to hear her call him "Myron"? Why is he even asking for such a thing? The corners of his lips curved up for a second as he nodded his head and hummed.

There was not much for him to say. He did not know if there was anything for him to say. Any words that were on tongue did not dare to slip out. Of course there was the fear of saying something he will regret, and yet, he felt something tug at his chest again.

It took a while for Myron to respond to the queen's question. He was too deep into his thoughts and too focused on staring at her grin that he almost missed what she asked him. Thankfully, he managed to snap back into reality and nod. He quietly chuckled. "Yes, Your Majesty. I would love to see them."

(Thumbs-up. You’re welcome)

Yethesa didn’t notice how her choice of words had affected Myron, nor did she think much of it. She had been honest and vague, and was truly grateful to finally have someone that would comfort her.

Though, she did notice his reaction to her saying his name. It was hard to suppress a giggle. Maybe it was a good thing that she had waited to say his name. The way his cheeks looked, and that little smile, was enough to brighten her day considerably more.

Misty kept most of Yethesa’s attention as she waited for his reply. She then glanced up at Myron, finally noticing his staring, but didn’t mind at all. At his reply, she beamed.

“I will warn you ahead of time, I have five pets in total. I’m actually limited to that number. There’s a rather hilarious story explaining why, but before I get ahead of myself… Come,”Yethesa mentioned with a chuckle.

With Misty still in her arms, she led Myron to a large room with several windows. There was a box of pet toys to the side and in the back corner was a large pantry. To the side of the room, against the same wall as the pantry, there was a long table with two terrariums, both covered with black cloth, and a bird cage with a preening cockatiel inside. In the corner opposite the pantry, a dark brown labrador with a grayed muzzled napped on a fluffy bed.

Yethesa giggled at the sight of the dog, then set Misty down. The purring cat stayed next to Yethesa, kneading the floor. Yethesa smiled, then turned to Myron and pointed to the sleeping labrador.

“He’s Henrik, the oldest of the five. I think he’s about… nine or ten years old. He was passed down to me by tradition. His bloodline has served the royal family of Ebleau for generations. It’s actually quite fascinating. He’s very gentle and friendly, though he loves to play when he’s not napping.”

Yethesa chuckled, then pointed to the cockatiel. The bird had apparently noticed them and started to whistle happily.

“This would be Edmund. I got him a couple years ago. He’s the singer of the group, if it wasn’t obvious. He likes to tease and mess with Misty, but they actually get along really well,”Yethesa explained, giggling at memories of the two playing with each other.

She then turned to the terrariums.

“And, these two are mostly nocturnal. Javver, my lovely little gecko, and Alrin, the adorable hedgehog. I got them sometime after Edmund from a visiting foreign merchant. If you want, we can try to look at them. Javver may be a bit difficult to find though, since he likes to hide in the back. Alrin, on the other hand, has a little cave where he sleeps, and it’s fairly easy to spot him,”Yethesa said, looking at Myron curiously.

Limiting the queen on how many pets she can keep is strange to hear; he wondered how that happened. Five pets does seem like a lot in his opinion, yet he is curious to see the other four. He is curious to see what they are like and how the queen would be while showing them. The heat burning his cheeks kept on while he sighed at himself as he heard her chuckle.

The moment the queen began to walk, he soon followed. Making sure he kept at least three steps behind her, his eyes glanced forward. One of the things he heard was to keep a minimal distance from Her Majesty. Not too close and surely not too far; now he is somehow very conscious about his walking.

Lowering his chin, Myron glanced down at the sleeping dog. Quickly, the corners of his lips rose up into a soft grin. He always loved dogs, especially the bigger breeds. Back in his old regiment, they had a big Doberman who was there to alert for attackers but always ended up receiving pets and food from everyone. Perhaps in the near future, he could pet Henrik if Her Majesty allowed.

Noticing the queen pointing, he turned to look in the direction. Myron tilted his head while seeing the bird. He is pretty sure he has never seen such a bird before. On the other hand, it the least of the strangest things that has happened to him today. It is a pretty bird indeed.

Part of him was actually more focused on their surroundings. He should not let one moment pass by where they are moving about and he is not surveying it for intruders. It is his job after all. And even though he is enjoying listening to the queen talk passionately about her pets, he has to protect her regardless of the situation. In a way it was all difficult. Myron did his absolute best to listen to Her Majesty while looking around the place as they moved. The smile on his face had faded as he kept his chin up, gazing around.

The feeling of the queen's eyes on him sent a shiver down his spine. He almost jumped a little when gazing back at her. "They all are very lovely, Your Majesty," He nodded. "Sorry, you must forgive me, my queen. I was dividing my attention between our surroundings, the pets, and…you. Although, I am very happy that you have showed me your wonderful pets."

As Yethesa spoke of Henrik, she noticed a small grin appear on Myron’s face. It pleased her that he seemed to like animals as well, and her own smile grew brighter.

While she pointed out Edmund and the others, she was oblivious to Myron’s vigilance. She was happy to simply ramble on about her pets, one of the few passions that had survived through her entire life.

Though, she finally noticed as she waited for his answer. It did disappoint her that his attention had drifted, but only slightly, and she understood well how difficult it could be to adjust to royal life.

At his words, she noticed the way he said ‘you’. The pause, the tone… did she dare believe what they seemed to imply? The attraction that might turn into love? She pushed those thoughts aside for the moment, smiling softly, a knowing look in her eyes.

“It is alright. I appreciate your vigilance, and truly understand how difficult it can be to adjust to so much in one day. If there is anything at all I can do to help make everything less… overwhelming, you only need ask,”Yethesa said.

“And I’m glad you like them. I wouldn’t know what to do without my darlings,”she added, her smile growing warm, her voice soft and sweet.

"I am sorry, Your Majesty." Myron gave another bow. Strands of hair fell in front of him as he did so before going back as he stood up straight. The corners of his lips lightly pulled up giving him a gentle smile.

He feels terrible for not paying his full attention to her talking about her pets. The way she lit up while speaking of them is breathtaking. How can anyone not fall in love in the way her eyes gleam on their own or the way she spoke with so much fondness in her voice?

A shiver ran down his spine. His breath hitched but he soon exhaled deeply. He could not help but give another another apologetic bow to the queen. "Thank you for your support, Your Majesty," He said. "Although, I do worry if I ask for your help. I do not want to bother you, my queen, with my own troubles. I shall do my best to adjust so I can serve you to the best of my abilities."

Warmth kissed his cheeks. They flared red as she spoke. Myron did everything in his power to resist the urge to let his eyes stare into hers, and he nearly lost to it. That smile… It is incredibly familiar to him, but why?

"Of course, how could I not, my queen? If I may be honest, I only ever had one pet, but they make everything so much better. I am glad that they make you very happy."

“It is alright. I am not upset, I assure you,”she replied gently.

When Myron bowed, Yethesa couldn’t help but admire the way his hair moved. She remembered how she would always play with her love’s hair, and how he would smile at her, or tease her about her adoration of his hair.

And then that smile, so gentle, so kind, so soothing. How she had missed seeing that look. It was so relieving to see it once again.

Yethesa then noticed the way his breath caught, and his deep breath afterward. She wondered why he did that. Was it her offer to help him? Was it something else? It nagged at her to ask him, but she didn’t dare, not so soon. Oh, why did propriety have to exist? It was so limiting, particularly to royals.

“It will not be a burden to help you adjust, Captain Chilikov. You have helped me a lot so far, and we only just met. I feel that it would be rude of me to not help you in return,”she insisted, her eyes gently pleading him. She truly didn’t want him to suffer.

When he blushed, Yethesa couldn’t resist a giggle. She couldn’t help it. He looked so sweet when he blushed. And she did notice how he was trying not to look her in the eye. He was definitely trying to stay proper, and doing fairly well at it. Though, Yethesa had a feeling that she was failing at that same task.

Her smile brightened at his words. She absolutely adored that he appreciated pets, and it made her almost giddy to think that he had had one, even if it was a small number.

“They do indeed. I have always found comfort around pets, or just animals in general. I’ve been that way since I was little,”she replied happily.

Myron gave a simple head bow. While he was relieved to hear that she is not upset, the terrible feeling still hung in him. Moving a lock of hair behind his ear, he glanced down at the floor before lifting his chin up and took a gaze around them. For some reason, he never really thought of the queen being an animal person, but hearing her talk about it made him feel happy. He could listen to her talk about animals and her pets all day if possible. "Ah, I see. Were you ever into horses, Your Majesty?" He asked. "If I may ask, what was your first pet, my queen?"

For some odd reason, a dream he had in the past came to mind. He was in it, but he was not Myron. The queen was in it as well, but she was not Her Majesty. They did not wear the clothes of this time, although the way her eyes lit up was the same. Her smile and the way she looked at him. It all was the same. She even was holding a cat and petting it as they spoke. They were close, laughing together. Suddenly, he was brought back into reality.

"Hm?" He shook his head then blinked. Listening to what the queen said, he gulped and nodded. How would Her Majesty even help him? She is very kind to him. It is very touching to the point where he cannot help but smile shyly. "It is alright, Your Majesty. I think that I will do fine as time goes on," He stated. "All I really ask for is your support and to be well." He is not sure what else to ask of her. To him having the queen, someone who is way above him, offer their help is strange. In the past, he did everything by himself without being asked if he needed help or not.

"Forgive me for being off topic, my queen, but I noticed that all the other guards have short hair. Should I have my hair be the same as everyone else's?" However the idea came to be, it simply did. His mind is running around in circles, and one of the things it thought was the way all the other guards looked. "I could put it up if it is no trouble. My queen, I just do not wish to look disheveled or anything. I want to look good and uniform for you, my queen."

Yethesa watched him, then chuckled at his questions.

“Actually yes. I grew up with a few horses, and was taught how to ride them as a girl. I actually own a couple now. And, I’ll be honest and admit to you that I like to occasionally sneak out for an early morning jaunt,”she said with a snicker.

“In regard to my first pet… goodness, I’ve had so many that it’s difficult to remember… I suppose it was a horse, though I also grew up with cats,”she answered.

Yethesa noticed how Myron seemed to zone out for a moment, but didn’t ask about it. She then noticed his reaction to her words, and watched him, her eyes gentle and patient. She smiled softly at his words.

“Alright. If you are sure, but don’t be afraid to ask if you need help or clarification. And, I may be a higher rank than you, but we both are human, regardless of any ranks or duties we may have at any moment,”she said gently.

Or, at least, mostly human.

Yethesa stared at him a moment, a bit surprised by the sudden change in subject. She hadn’t even noticed that his hair was different, though it didn’t help that she had been more focused on memories to notice. It was actually a little saddening to think that he would have to do anything to his hair.

“I… suppose. Truly, I had been so caught up in the moment that I didn’t even think of that, and the difference really doesn’t bother me. So, I suppose I’ll leave it up to you,”she said, a bit shyly. She wanted to tell him that she actually liked the way his hair was, but she was afraid he would react badly to such forwardness.

A shiver ran down his spine. Her laughter is mellifluous. Well, he doesn't know what the word means, but he is very sure that it is a perfect one to describe the queen's laughter and voice. Myron wanted to laugh in response to what she said, but he only just nodded and smiled. "Well, I suppose I will have to wake up very early in the morning and keep an eye on you."

What she said was true. Regardless of their ranks, they are still humans, and even a mighty fighter as himself needs help. Really, he appreciates it. Never has he been given such an offer. Never has anyone of a high rank has been this kind to him. Despite doing it in the last few minutes, he bowed.

"Thank you, Your Majesty. I will keep it the way it is, although I suppose I could try to look for some nice ribbon to tie it up into a bun." He gazed upon her, although there was something off about her. Biting the inside of his lip, he felt his face becoming warmer. Hopefully he did not come down with a fever or anything. Why was he so warm all of the sudden? "Ah my apologies for bringing such a strange thing up, my queen. As I said before, I just want to look nice for you. Forgive me for saying this, but I do not want to look messy around a beautiful monarch such as yourself."

About a year into his military career, he heard from a general about how a few centuries ago, soldiers would keep their hair long because their ladies loved to play with and admire it when they returned. The story sounded lovely to him, so that is why he kept his hair the way it is now. Although he does not have a lady, but maybe someday soon he will. For now though, he will have to keep it and look nice, especially for the queen.

(I am so sorry it took me so long to reply. This past week has been utter chaos)

Yethesa snickered at his reply, a playful gleam flashing in her eyes.

“I suppose so,”she said in amusement.

Yethesa smiled softly at his bow, happy that he seemed to appreciate her willingness to help. It would truly bother her to see him struggle, and she still believed it would be rude to not help him after all he had done so far. And that was without mentioning Myron’s significance to her, the memories, their old love. Some part of her felt that she owed it to him, the same part that wanted to burst into tears and beg him for forgiveness.

Yethesa nodded,”I could possibly find you one. One of the servants likes to keep extra ribbons around just in case. I’m just not entirely sure where she likes to stash them.”

In truth, she knew exactly where the ribbon stash was, partly because some of the ribbons were her own, and very old. Yethesa had often put her old love’s hair in a ponytail, and would stroke or fiddle with his silky locks afterward. She had always loved doing that to him. After his death, she had kept every ribbon she had as mementos of him. The number had dwindled over time, but the handful still surviving gave her comfort.

As she was about to respond to his apology, Yethesa finally registered the rest of his words and paused. Her cheeks grew hot and she couldn’t resist a small giggle. She smiled at him.

“There is no need to apologize. I appreciate your courtesy and attention to detail… and your compliment,”Yethesa replied, her voice a bit quieter with the last part. Her eyes and smile were sincere.

(It's all good. I appreciate your response.)

Myron wondered how many times he has apologized to the queen and bowed in front of her. He wondered if it was beginning to annoy her or not. Is he fool for the continuous apologies? A lord explained to him about propriety, including bows and asking for forgiveness. The noble told him that it is highly important to do so, but never mentioned to stop if it was bothering Her Majesty.

She does not appear to be bothered at all. Right in front of him, he sees a smiling monarch looking back at him. The alluring sight is making him feel fuzzy inside. He does not even know how to describe it. The feelings and sensations are familiar, but he has never felt anything like this before. What does it mean? Does this all relate to his dreams? His episodes? And yet, her smile is brighter than the sun. It is brighter than any star he has ever seen.

"Huh? I beg your pardon?" Her words made his attention come back from wandering. Slowly he had become stiff as he realized what she said. The corners of his lips were fighting to stay low, despite the urge for them to come up into a big grin. He rubbed the back of his neck while looking down at the ground.

"If it isn't any trouble, Your Majesty, I greatly appreciate it," He nodded. The queen is going to find him a ribbon? What had he done in his past life to deserve this? Whatever he had done, it must have been good. Fiddling with his fingers, he looked off to the side at the sun. "Oh…" His eyes wandered back over to the queen as he tried not to get lost in her calming, beautiful aura. He mustn't, and yet, he wants to. "If I may ask, Your Majesty, please pick a ribbon for me in your favorite color. Even it will not match my guard uniform, please pick one in your favorite color, please."

He was about to bow again as a way of saying thanks, but he caught himself. No, he mustn't do anything to annoy the queen. And he should not let his eyes linger on her too. Ah, those eyes though. The way she speaks and smiles at him. It makes him feel like he is the richest person in the whole wide world. "Thank you….Your Majesty."

(Yup. I honestly love how this is going. I just wish my schedule wasn’t so crazy. I don’t know when it’ll stabilize again)
(In other details, I’ve been wondering about a name for Myron’s past self. I’m not sure if you had one in mind or not, and I’m honestly blanking right now. Or, do you want to do something like his name was lost to time, or otherwise forgotten?)

Yethesa watched Myron a moment, noticing how he seemed to drift into his thoughts again. She didn’t mind too much. After all, she did that sometimes, and some days that was all she did.

When he came out of his thoughts, she saw his reaction, and almost burst into a cheerful fit of laughter. He looked so sweet when he was fighting a smile, and even sweeter when he looked away. Such a gentle, lovable man.

“It’s no trouble at all,”she replied, her smile brightening.

She took a step toward her bedroom, but paused when he turned away. She waited patiently, watching as he turned back. Something about his gaze reminded her of the many times where she and her love would just stare at each other for long moments, basking in the adoration of the other. It was subtle, a barely perceptible hint In Myron’s eyes, but just enough to revive those memories. How much she missed those moments, and now, it seemed possible that she might have them again.

His words brought her out of her thoughts, but she didn’t quite catch his first words. When she finally registered what he had said, she couldn’t resist a giggle.

“Of course, Captain Chilikov. I would be happy to,”she said.

She started away, then paused again at his thanks, smiling softly. She didn’t mind at all that he seemed to almost forget saying her title. It was still a bit strange to be Queen after so many years of being a noble, then a student. And Myron was even more unused to it than her. After all, this was still their first meeting.

“You’re welcome. I’ll be back in a moment,”she said.

Yethesa headed off to her bedroom, searching through a few drawers just in case, then found the one she was looking for. She searched through the ribbons, pausing at the sight of the old ones she had kept. It was tempting to give him one of them, but it might raise too many questions. So, instead, she chose one of the newest in her collection, and it was a dark green, her favorite.

Yethesa smiled softly, then returned to Myron. She showed the ribbon to him.

“Do you want to tie it, or do you want me to?”she offered softly. Yethesa wanted to be polite and let him have the choice. And it was also more subtle to offer to tie his hair up, then to do it anyway, despite the temptation.

(Me too, I really love this rp! I hope your schedule settles out soon.)
(I do have a name in mind, but I am thinking of how to bring it up. Probably through a dream or vision soon.)

His lips thinned out, turning into a small gleam. Giving into the urge, he just stood there and smiled. Ah heavens, he really could not help it. If only he knew why he was acting so strange, then maybe he would be able to understand everything. As long as the queen took no offense to it and was smiling as she is now, then maybe it is alright.

"Oh…Thank you, Your Majesty," He said under his breath. Immediately, he bent at the waist to bow. Once he stood up regularly, his attention began to waver again. Sunlight had suddenly faded around him. He is not what he just was a second ago. The queen was right in front of him, but she looked the same as she did in his last vision and in all those dreams.

Another vision had bestowed upon him. After a simple tug, his hair was put up. He stood up and turned to face her. His hair was put up in a half ponytail so his bangs were back from his eyes. Turning to face her, he took another ribbon out of his pocket. Despite not being sure why she loved it, he handed her the ribbon. That familiar shining light in her eyes showed. The vision had ended. A shiver ran down his spine as he glanced around his surroundings.

Myron took a step forward, he soon realized that Her Majesty had already went to get a ribbon. Should he follow her or should he stay put? The question made his shoulders tense up. Well, it is practically his job to follow the queen around and protect her. Although, it is too late to run after her and he does not want to intrude on her. On the other hand, he worried that he was not doing his job well.

The question made his ears burn red. Not mention, his heart practically leaped out of his chest when noticing that the queen had returned. He sighed.

"May you tie it for me, please, Your Majesty?" With wide eyes, he instantly lowered his head to look at the ground. The question fell out of his lips, smoothly rolling off his tongue. It was like something had overtaken him and made him say those words. Deep down, he did want to say it, yet he knows that he should just do it himself. Having the queen already getting him a ribbon is a lot as it is.

(Big grin. Yeah, me too)
(Thumbs-up. Ooh… that would be neat)

At the sight of Myron’s smile, Yethesa beamed. That smile, so sweet and gentle… She loved it. A giggle escaped her and she blushed a bit, caught off guard by her own laughter.

She then nodded at his words and bow. She didn’t mind how much he bowed, it being proper etiquette and all, though she could probably give him some advice later on how to judge when a bow was needed and when it was too much. Just in case.

As Yethesa searched, she didn’t even notice Myron’s absence. She had figured that he had stayed behind to be respectful, giving her some privacy to search, which she appreciated. So, when she returned, and saw his expression, she wondered if he was questioning himself, wondering if he was doing things right. Oh, the poor man, still so lost in what to do. She would have to rectify that, to the best of her abilities.

Yethesa smiled sweetly at his question. She then fought to control a giggle at his reaction afterward. He was so timid about it, but she had noticed the way he had asked her. The smooth words, as if he had been expecting her question and had wanted to ask her that the whole time.

“Of course. Though, you’ll have to lean your head back a bit first,”she answered, a hint of amusement in her voice. She had a contented smile, one that showed, without Yethesa realizing, that she had wanted to tie up his hair, and that she was happy he had allowed it.

She then started to gently comb her fingers through his hair, organizing it as much as savoring its softness. So many memories resurfaced then, and a skill she had thought long forgotten returned to her. Yethesa moved his hair the way she wanted it to, only muscle memory leading her as she tied his hair into a half ponytail. It was almost identical to the ponytail in Myron’s vision, though she wasn’t aware of it.

“There. Is that alright?”she asked, leading him over to a mirror.

Her giggle. She giggled again. His heart thumped louder for a second. Myron even brought his his hand up to his chest momentarily. Thump. It went at it again as his eyes noticed the way her cheeks flared up. "Are you alright, Your Majesty? Do you have a fever?" He was not sure if she was sick or not, though he felt inclined to ask. Well, he has been blushing a lot too for the past few hours. Then again, it may have to do with his strange condition.

A gentle sigh had fallen out of his lips. Tension from his body had gone away for now. He felt relieved that the queen did not mind tying up his hair. Truly he must have done something in his past life for such kindness. Her smile. The more he looks at it, the more he feels as if his heart is going to leap out of him. It is one of the most beautiful things he has ever seen. Nothing can compare to it. Nothing ever can.

All he could do was just nod his head then lean it back. It was difficult to describe what flowed through him as he felt her fingers in his hair. The tingling sensation was nostalgic. He tried with all his might to fight off the beam that was steadily appearing on him. His feet planted in the ground. Again, his hand rested on his chest.

Myron followed the queen, looking at her intently before gazing over at the mirror. His reflection smiled back at him for a moment. "It's been a while, hm?" By the time he had blinked, he saw his eyes widened. He saw his true perplexed face. He saw his bangs pulled back with the dark green ribbon. Nothing had changed. Everything was back to normal. Oh how these visions scare him still. Him, a renowned fighter for his kingdom, for his queen, scared of what he sees.

Then he saw Her Majesty in the mirror. Did she see what happened? Turning over his left shoulder, he nodded. "It is more than alright," He responded, softly. "Thank you so much, Your Majesty. This means a lot to me." He pointed at the ribbon keeping his hair up. "I will remember this forever. Sincerely."

(Sorry again for the wait)

“I’m alright, Captain Chilikov. I’m happy, not ill,”she said to reassure him.

It was so sweet of him to be concerned, even when he had no need to be. ‘Sweet’ was just a really good word to describe Myron. Sure, part of her opinion was probably biased because of memories, but the man really was so thoughtful and kind.

And he was also quite timid. Thankfully, he seemed to relax a bit when she moved to tie his hair. But as she fiddled with his hair, then led him to the mirror, she noticed a change in the air. It was something different, older, but she couldn’t accurately describe it.

Gazing at Myron in the mirror, both of them smiling, brought back so many memories. Yethesa could almost see her old room, where they would stand staring at each other in the mirror, bathed in candlelight and moonlight. They had first talked about eloping in front of that long ago mirror, and she could almost see him turn to look at her, his gentle expression full of love just before he proposed to her.

Though, when she instead saw Myron’s face become perplexed, Yethesa quickly forced herself back to reality. Was something wrong? Had she done something while reminiscing that could make him react as he did? She glanced at him with concern, but calmed a bit when he looked at her.

At his words, Yethesa smiled again.

“You’re welcome, Captain Chilikov. I’m truly glad you like it so much,”she replied honestly, her smile growing brighter. If only you knew how much this means to me. How much I have truly missed tying your hair and seeing your smile.