forum Is this too... far-fetched?
Started by @LilNerdyGingerKitsune
tune

people_alt 3 followers

@LilNerdyGingerKitsune

Sooooo….. basically, my story Prism is about four sisters who are basically super soldiers like Captain America except slightly different and they were given their powers by a vaccine their mom created and now their trying to save the world, blah blah blah, something like that. So, their mom loves them to pieces, like she wasn't like using them as guinea pigs for her experiment. The vaccine was accidentally injected into them. I came up with an idea on how it was injected into Brielle (the oldest), but I'm worried its too wild of an idea, so, just let me know if this is stupid.

Their mom was working on a Government project to make vaccine that could to strengthen human skin and allow people to live longer even when losing massive amounts of blood. It was called the Diamond Project, and years pass and nothing they try works, so the project is soon planned to be shut down. Aimee (their mom) says however that she's perfected the serum and just needs to test it! But this isn't the first time she's "perfected" the serum so they're like "no go home, btw don't bring it with you" but she doesn't listen because she's stubborn and the projects hits really close for her (family member died from blood loss) so she really wants this to work. So she sneaks it home, and buys a rabbit from a pet store to test it on. Because she doesn't want her kids around when she tests it, she sends the oldest to a friend's house, and puts her younger two down for a nap. She gets it in the syringe, all ready to be used, when she hears a crash in the other room. (This is when it gets a little far-fetched) She frustratingly checks on her “napping” children, when nine-year-old Brielle comes in a little later with a stray cat (this is normal for her cause she likes cats). The cat, upon seeing the rabbit in the cage, goes leaping from her arms onto the desk, knocking everything off the table including the vaccine. Brielle runs over to regain control of the cat, but completely trips and falls on her face, and in the process of trying to dodge a falling book accidentally stabs and injects herself with the vaccine.
Being the kid who's more worried about her mom being upset with her for messing up her things than what actually was injected into her bloodstream runs out of the room and hides. Aimee comes in, sees cat on table harassing her bunny and empty syringe on the floor, asks Brielle if she was in her mom's room. "No" she lied but ta-da by the next 24 hours Brielle's a superhero.

Is the whole cat and rabbit thing a bit too convenient? Or does it work? Or is it just stupid in general?

@Blossom_Utonium

Okay, consider this: what if instead of it being a vaccine, it was a pill or a liquid. Then it would be much easier to explain that Brielle accidentally ate it because she genuinely thought it was medicine.

@WriteOutofTime

Yes yes I agree with @Blossom_Utonium. It would be way easier to ingest a pill or a liquid accidentally than to fall on a syringe and inject all of the serum accidentally. Never rely too heavily on coincidences for a plot.