forum I made a colony!

Started October 04, 2018 by @Yamatsu

tune

I have a new location that I would like critiqued. Leave your thoughts below, and if anyone speaks Arabic, please, PLEASE make sure that the motto is grammatically correct. I know how finicky Google Translate can be…

well im not very good at critiquing and i dont know Arabic but your location seems to be very well planned out and has some very interesting features. i especially like the founding story. keep up the good work

I don't know Arabic, but there are some issues with your translation and the location. Arabic is written from right to left, but you've positioned the phrase as left to right and it's not obvious whether it's the translation of the official or unofficial motto. Google translate is an awful website to be getting phrases and even individual words as anyone can contribute to it without fact checking. Arabic has very different grammar from English, and Google Translate will not pick this up (As an example, I tested to see how the website would translate the phrase 'La sua sedia' from Italian to English. It means 'His/Her chair' but the machine repeated the literal phrase 'The his chair').

Additionally, why is the colony based in a desert? Colonies will be based in areas with the best resources or access (E.g. Next to rivers, the sea, pastures). Even Ancient Egyptian civilisation was based on the Nile, and people who live in the Sahara Desert (which I'm assuming your Desert is based on) are nomads. (Just noticed the aquifer stuff, nvm)

The economy and (lack of) farming system wouldn't be viable as well. Companies and businesses wouldn't be able to function without loans. Also, civilisations that have used non paper currency have done so because they didn't have paper or large companies (I am partly assuming that your colony's economic system is or is based on capitalism). It becomes more difficult to trade with coins rather than with slips (E.g. A £5 banknote is equivalent to 500 pennies. Which one would be easier for a company to use?).

As soon as food imports stop or are blocked, there would be riots with the lack of food. This puts your colony in a vulnerable position as they have to ensure food security and that lack of food isn't used as political leverage by enemies. You've written that crops can't be grown in the desert, but humans have been overcoming environmental limitations for a long time, otherwise then we wouldn't have monoculture farming, greenhouses, or fertilisers. Chances are your people - especially those seeking to exploit the gap in the market - would find and develop a way to grow crops, even if it's underground, to sell. This could also be used for political power (who controls the food supply can dictate what happens in the city).

Thank you, I've been looking back and finding some other strange holes in reasoning as well, such as why the main export would be freakin' sand and volcanic glass. Also, if there are aquifers, then people could totally grow hardy food and then only get things that are native to the mountains where the colonists came from. Thank you for the translation thing, I might just have to consult with someone over the actual translation seeing as I have absolutely NO experience with the Arabic language. I knew I was pressing my luck with Google, but I have no idea where else to translate that is free and doesn't have me talking with another person.

You're welcome! :)

why the main export would be freakin' sand and volcanic glass.

To be fair, sand is required for making building materials and not all kinds of sand can be used - not those in deserts. Australia exports sand to Saudi Arabia. The glass could also be for building and artistic reasons, though your culture could have a special use for this glass (E.g. It's important for magic, it's used to make items for a particular religion).

I have no idea where else to translate that is free and doesn't have me talking with another person.
(Assuming when you say 'talking' you mean like physically over the phone or Skype etc.)

/r/Translation on Reddit could be one place to go. It's free to get a Reddit account and you can delete it afterwards if you want to.

I understood the building material bit, but I think it's strange that sand would be the only export. However, volcanic glass is common due to the supposedly dormant volcanoes that deposited chunks of obsidian. I think I might add glass-making to the export list, as everyone needs vases, glasses, cups, windows, etc.