forum Private with Serpentess

Started February 11, 2022 by @emilyevewrites group

tune

"Nothing," Farah murmured, shaking her head and not looking at him. "Nothing, it was nothing… but I still have nightmares about Rosalind too," she admitted quietly. "From time to time. It's always the same scene in my mind. I don't understand why…"

Farah lifted her face from his chest and met Mardicos's gaze. "Rosalind… she told me once that I needed to do something more practical with my hair rather than just tying it up in a tail. So, I learned how to do different braids and curls and make it look beautiful, but stricter like she wanted. During our… night… she took it down, and since then, I've always seen it as too intimate to share with anyone else. It's become a sort of vice. I indulge in making my hair beautiful. But before I told you all of that, what did the style of my hair say about my character?"

Mardicos sighed softly, understanding what had happened. He rubbed her back some more, hoping to soothe her.

“I understand that feeling,”he said gently.

Mardicos listened, shaking his head slightly at how this Rosalind woman had treated Farah. If he ever met Rosalind, if she was even still alive, he would gladly rip open her throat with his fangs, and that was just to start. But, Farah’s question brightened his thoughts, and a small smile appeared.

“That you are studious and guarded, but also modest. You also are, or were, a leader. Though, I’ll admit, that last bit isn’t defined by your hair alone. And, I still stand to that, even after what you just told me,”he answered.

Every touch and every rub caused Farah to relax a bit more until she was practically melted against him. It was no secret the woman was horribly touch starved. She'd been isolated for sixteen years, and tears threatened her vision at the feeling of being held again by someone so strong yet gentle.

Farah laughed shakily at his description of her. "I was a leader once," she murmured, shaking her head slowly. "Though I'm not sure it's something I deserve to be anymore."

The fairy swallowed and sighed softly. "I couldn't even kill her," she breathed. "I couldn't bring myself to kill her… not even after everything she did… I trapped her, instead. Inside a prison barrier in the heart of Alfea's hidden undercroft. She's my living ghost even though she's worlds away."

The more Farah melted into him, the more Mardicos realized how much he didn’t want to let go. He, himself, was drastically touched starved, though he hadn’t realized it until then. And, it brought him solace to finally hold someone who wasn’t out to hurt him. Though, it was also reminding him of how exhausted he actually was. He hadn’t slept at all recently.

After listening to her words, he gently lifted her chin with his fingers so they could meet eyes.

“Farah, you deserve much more than you have received. That much is obvious to me. The question is not ‘what you deserve’ but ‘what you want’. There is no reason you cannot be a leader again if that’s what you want. Even with the past lurking nearby, there is always opportunity ahead,”he said softly.

When she spoke of Rosalind, questions flooded his mind. Could he have spared Eidna? Could he have trapped her instead of killing her? Would he have found more peace that way? Would they have been able to forgive each other?

Mardicos quickly pushed those questions away, wanting to focus on the moment. Eidna was long gone, hundreds of years dead. Farah was in front of him, cradled in his arms, speaking of her own demons.

“That shows that you still have a conscience. You are not like her. And you are not a killer. She’s a manipulative bitch, and you got away from her, scathed or not. That’s worth something,”he breathed.

Farah's breath hitched as he tilted her chin up. The motion was slow and soft and smooth, and she was used to people touching her in other, more… aggressive ways.

She shook her head. "I could never trust myself to be a leader again. Not after Aster Dell. And even if I did want to return, no one would trust me. Except for Saul… or Ben… or Rose. Maybe even Luna." The more she dug up the names from her past, the more hesitant she seemed to become.

"But no, I wouldn't say I got away from her unscathed," Farah whispered quietly. "Some wounds aren't easily seen on the surface. Rosalind left gashes in my mind… she was a mind fairy too. With both of our powers, we had an immensely deep connection… and she abused it."

Mardicos nodded,”I can understand that. And, it’s fucked that you have so few allies at home. But, if you ever trust yourself to lead again, there are other places. Karadorn is a much, much bigger place than it looks. Believe me, I’ve been to two of Karadorn’s three habitable continents. I never thought this world was so fucking big.”

He noticed her hesitance, and pondered who those others were to her. Just friends? Family? More? Regardless, either she was trying to keep herself calm, or she was pondering how much they would trust her. Or both. This Saul, though, was likely the closest of her allies.

Mardicos sighed, tenderly caressing Farah’s cheek. Her words reminded him of his bond with Eidna. Though it hadn’t been as deep as telepathy, there had still been depth in it. But… he didn’t remember one moment where they had held each other simply to be close.

“Some scars cannot even be seen by their owner,”Mardicos breathed, his mind whirling.

Eidna had been his first relationship, and all of his subsequent relationships had gone similarly. An untrustworthy witch seducing him, then betraying him in some way. Had he been wrong the whole time? Looking at the wrong women, seeking the wrong things?

And now Farah. Lovely Farah, who was as broken as he was, and all they were doing was holding each other. This was no passionate affair based on false emotions. Hell, they were barely more than acquaintances. And yet, here they were, seeking comfort in each other’s arms. Was this what he had been missing?

"Well, Saul and I were especially very close, so I didn't see the need to expand my trust anywhere else. I've never acquainted myself with many people other than those four and Andreas, but I know that he despises me now. He's loyal to Rosalind," Farah remarked bitterly. Once upon a time, Farah and Andreas could've been friends.

Her thoughts were immediately drawn away from Andreas and Saul, however, as Mardicos caressed her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned into the touch to savor it. The woman had no clue how badly she'd needed an embrace until she had one. And she didn't want to leave it.

In Mardicos's arms, she felt protected. Like anything from her past that wanted to harm her had to get through him first. It was an odd feeling. She'd never pictured herself needing anyone to help defend her before.

"I'm afraid we both have such scars," she whispered, opening her eyes again to meet his intently. His gaze was so direct and fierce, Farah couldn't look away even if she wanted to.

(Nah. Who sleeps, lol?)
(Sorry again about taking so long. I tried to reply yesterday, but… I fell asleep. Lmao! And today’s events were… interesting, so yeah)

“Makes sense. I once knew a similar situation. I didn’t really socialize because I saw no point in it. Though, wearing a crown is always lonely, even when surrounded by a horde.”Mardicos commented. He grunted at the mention of Andreas, displeased by the thought that anyone could be loyal to a wretched woman like Rosalind.

His eyes widened when Farah leaned into his touch. It was such a different feeling. The way she closed her eyes, leaning closer to truly savor the sensation, was so unlike the way Eidna had leaned into his hand. It was so much more… real. Farah wasn’t acting. Eidna… had always been acting. And Mardicos was only now seeing that. Eidna…

Eidna. Why did his mind always drift to her? He needed to quit comparing Farah to Eidna, to any of his previous relationships. Farah was nothing like Eidna. She had no political agenda, no need or desire to seduce him or use him. Farah just wanted the company, and dare he say, to help him. And that’s all he had ever wanted. To finally meet a woman he could trust.

His breath hitched at her words, then her eyes froze him in place. The beautiful eyes of the only woman that had ever understood his pain.

“In a strange way, it’s a relief to know that we share them. We don’t have to suffer them alone anymore,”he breathed.

"Indeed it is," Farah whispered, tilting her head to look at his face more clearly. She studied every little detail of his features. He had all the characteristics of a man Farah had known several years ago. Since then, she'd come to terms with the fact that he hadn't truly liked her.

Most people, like Rosalind, saw Farah's power and wanted to be able to manipulate or at least control it. There were literal crowds of people who had surrounded Farah when she'd been trying to get to classes of people who wanted to be her friend or a romantic partner, but she'd never been interested in anyone who only looked at her and saw her abilities.

Now, Mardicos stood in front of her – the literal opposite of everything she'd grown accustomed to seeing in people, and she wasn't sure what to do with herself.

"Thank you," she finally said after a slightly-too-long-and-therefore-awkward silence between them as they held each other.

Mardicos was so absorbed in Farah’s eyes and his own thoughts and realizations that he didn’t know how long the silence had lasted until she spoke. He gave her a soft smile, one that was almost shy.

“Thank you, for everything that you’ve done for me,”he replied.

His thumb rubbed her cheek as he gazed at her. Then, after a moment, he pulled her closer, wrapping her in another hug and nuzzling into her hair again. He closed his eyes, basking in her scent for a long moment. Any lingering tension in his body melted away, and he was tempted to doze off right where he was.

Mardicos lifted his head slightly after a moment, growing increasingly tired. It seemed that he had found his limit on how long he could stay awake. Damn it, he hated full moons.

“If you wish, we can sit or do something else. I am fine with whatever you decide, though I must admit, I am rather exhausted,”he mumbled.

Mardicos truly didn’t care what Farah decided. Hell, they could stay standing, wrapped in each other’s arms, all day long, and he wouldn’t complain. Though, if they did, he might end up falling over because he’d fallen asleep. It wouldn’t necessarily bother him, but he didn’t want Farah getting hurt in that sort of situation.

"Of course," Farah murmured. "It's what anyone would have done. Well, anyone who is at least half-decent. I couldn't have just left you out there. You would have died. I can't have any more blood on my hands, even if it's unintentional."

Every place he touched her, she felt unspeakable warmth pass between them. It wasn't hot and aggressive touches like Rosalind had forced on her, but these touches were gentle, caring, soft, and yet had a bit of heat to them that Farah found herself seeking out in Mardicos.

She could feel the moment he allowed himself to relax completely and the moment he realized just how tired he was. "If you're tired, I'm not going to keep you from resting," she remarked. "Would you like to sleep? Or sit, at the very least?"

“Anyone who is half-decent to a lycanthrope. It is a rare thing to find someone like that. And, I am eternally grateful that you are one of them,”he breathed.

Mardicos continued to savor the smell of Farah’s hair, of her. He still held her close, and the longer he held her, the more he found that he loved it. The proximity was quite soothing, and Farah was so sweet and accepting. It was truly wondrous that he had found someone like Farah.

Mardicos listened to her words, chuckling. She was considerate too.

“Do I want to sleep? No. Do I need to? Admittedly, yes. And, your presence is extraordinarily relaxing. But, I think sitting will be fine, if you don’t mind sitting with me,”he said.

"I'm sorry it is that way," Farah breathed her reply out quietly since they were so close. It didn't take much for her voice to reach his ears at how close he had her pulled against him. Not that she minded. In fact, it was the opposite. She adored being held this way.

She could hear his breathing shift as he took deep inhales of her hair, and she smiled at the thought. Her hair was her pride. When she would give him a complete tour of the house, he'd be able to see in her room the multitude of hair products she'd brought with her from the Otherworld.

"Of course, I don't mind," Farah answered easily. She felt a soft blush rise to her face as he added a short comment about her relaxing presence. It was because she was expelling a bit of magic through their touch to calm him and keep him that way, but it wasn't enough to deserve the remark of having an "extraordinarily relaxing" presence. Which meant–

Her mind quickly pushed the thought away. The last time she'd been transparent with him, he'd nearly left. "You'll need to let me go first," she murmured reluctantly.

“It’s the way it is. There’s not much either of us can really do,”Mardicos replied with a subtle shrug.

He decided not to dwell on the depressing thoughts that haunted his words, instead focusing on Farah. He could tell she liked being held this way, so close, practically tucked in his arms, and it brought a smile to his face.

His smile widened at her words and he took another deep inhale of her scent, closing his eyes. The smell of her hair was as intriguing as it was addictive, and he loved that she smelled so… nostalgic. It was almost intoxicating.

Her next words brought him out of his thoughts. He hummed, torn between his wonderful hold on Farah or the promise of sitting down and relaxing, and maybe even getting some much-needed sleep. After a moment, he lifted his head, gazing down at her with drowsy eyes.

“I do, don’t I? Damn. To be continued, then.”

He chuckled, hesitating a while before finally releasing Farah. He then quickly decided to let her take the lead on where to sit. This was her house, after all. She knew it far better than he did.

Farah relished each moment of Mardicos holding her up until he finally let her go. She sighed quietly and took a small step back from him before heading over to the room off her left.

This was the room that had a ridiculous amount of books piled on shelves and stacked precariously around the room's edges. "We can sit in here, if you like," Farah remarked, pacing over to a red chair by the window surrounded by books. "Or in the dining room? There's more room there than there is in here, but I love the atmosphere of books so much better, don't you?"

Farah turned to look at him with a gentle smile on her face and a new light behind her eyes. She looked at home in her little library. She looked like herself.

(Sorry about taking a minute to reply. I haven’t been very active lately because of IRL stuff and Writer’s Block)

Mardicos heard her sigh when he let go, and immediately understood what it meant. He already missed holding her, and he’d gladly hold her a lot more in the future if she wanted him to.

He followed her into the other room, admiring the many books. Along with watching Farah sit down, he looked around for another chair. He quickly found one, but it was a bit farther from the window than he wanted to be. So, after gently shifting some books out of the way, he moved the chair close to the window, but remained at a polite distance to avoid crowding Farah.

As he sat down, the sunlight caught his eyes, highlighting subtle flecks of light blue, like tiny icebergs shining in a vast sea at noon. When he was settled, his eyes were no longer in the sunlight, but they still gleamed.

“In here is fine. And, yes. I enjoy books, even though I don’t read as much as I did as a child. One of many prices I’ve paid by becoming feral. But, beyond that, I also have many fond memories in libraries,”Mardicos replied, a light smile appearing on his face as he spoke.

He stared at her, admiring her smile, and noticing the change in her eyes and demeanor. For some reason he couldn’t quite fathom, he felt like he could stare at her, sitting there as she was, all day and be content. It was… wondrous.

No. Not just ‘wondrous’. Beautiful. Serene. So… fucking lovely. Why have I never met such a woman before? Or have I been just too fucking blinded by guilt and fear to pay attention?

Farah noted the shift in his eye colors. She was lost in them for the briefest moment that felt like hours. Eventually, she broke eye contact and let her gaze linger over her books.

The contents of the pages ranged from runes to classic literature to botany to sword techniques. Many had come directly from the headmistress's personal library at Alfea. Rosalind's personal library.

Farah shuddered briefly at the thought before banishing the woman from her mind. It was horrible for her to keep thinking of Rosalind when she was in the pleasurable company of Mardicos.

"I suppose that does make sense," the fairy murmured, running her fingers over the weathered spine of the book she'd placed on her lap. "It does seem like you've had to make many sacrifices for the sake of becoming feral, haven't you?"

Her eyes tore away from the bindings to meet his once more. Her brown eyes appeared almost golden when the right light hit them.

(Took me a little longer to respond than I was thinking, but mere technicality, lol)

Mardicos leaned forward when he saw Farah shiver. It concerned him that she would do that in a place she considered a sanctuary. Though, he pondered the history behind the books around him, some of which said ‘Alfea’. That might be cause for Farah’s shiver, because of her history there. That seemed to concern him more, but he wouldn’t question it unless it was necessary. No need to break the tranquility of the room with such dark questions.

He sighed at her words and nodded.

“Indeed, I have. I sacrificed everything I knew, in fact. Aristocracy and grandeur. Heirlooms, of a wide variety. Mines that brought forth the most brilliant metals and gemstones. Grand libraries, full of the kingdom’s history. Quiet walks in the snow, along ancient mountain trails that overlooked the entire city. Now… not even the mountains remain,”he rambled, his voice getting quieter as he spoke.

He sat back in his chair, his shoulders sagging with melancholy as he stared absently ahead. Though, he did notice when she turned to meet his gaze again, and the way they shined in the light took his breath away.

Even true gold cannot compare to the beauty of her eyes.

He pondered the sudden thought, but he couldn’t deny that Farah’s eyes were truly beautiful. That Farah herself was nothing less than beautiful.

Farah's eyes softened at the mentions of all Mardicos had lost during his journey. It made her feel as though she might have been magnifying her own struggles too greatly. Compared to her, some others had much worse, she supposed.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly, running her fingers now over the cover. It was a book of runes and natural magic. "I didn't mean to stir up such negative emotions or memories. I only was curious about your journey. Mine seems smaller by comparison, though it feels like I've lived in this house for a hundred mortal lifetimes…"

She trailed off to notice the way he was meeting her gaze. The way he was simply looking at her. As if she was the most magnificent thing to ever exist. She maintained eye contact, but her fingers stopped moving, and she felt her breath catch.

Mardicos shook his head.

“Don’t apologize. It’s all distant memories, and I will never return there anyway,”he said softly.

He continued to gaze at her, barely registering the way she stilled. Though, he did notice when her breath hitched, primarily because of how keenly he heard it. His eyesight had also sharpened without him even realizing, accentuating every part of Farah’s beauty. It was… beyond words, and a bit terrifying.

Mardicos looked away, closing his eyes to compose himself. Oddly, he felt no malice lingering beneath his skin. He didn’t even feel the pain of claws or fur trying to break through his human flesh. Instead, he felt a gentle warmth from a pair of runic markings that he had thought would never be of any use.

“I apologize for staring so long. It’s just… strangely hard to resist,”he said quietly, opening his, now normal again, eyes and looking at the floor.

Truthfully, there wasn’t anything strange about it. He was just being polite, because it was actually very hard to resist looking at her. She was so foreign, and yet so familiar. She had a complexion that he had seen thousands of times before, but, somehow, it was still completely new. Her grace and intelligence was like that of a humble librarian combined with a queen. And, her accent was something he was wholly unfamiliar with. All those things put together resulted in a woman of limitless fascinating qualities. He could gaze at her all day, and possibly even in his dreams, and still be captivated.

And, the most shocking part was that he felt no guilt. Whatsoever. Nor did the memories of Eidna hold any sway over his feelings about it. Farah was his focus now, his prize, and no witch from a bygone era would hold him back.