forum In Fair Verona // Modern Romeo and Juliet // Private RP - CLOSED

Started February 05, 2019 by @blue_topaz

tune

I chose my next words carefully. "When you do return to Sicily, how long until I can see you again?"

I couldn’t hide the confusion on my face. You clearly don’t like me. Why do you want to see me again? “I assume it would be a month or two at the longest. Even my family isn’t so cruel to keep me away for too long when I’m to be married.”

Oh, thank god. I barely managed to keep the relief from my face. A month or two of the most peace I can get….

I gave him a simple nod, electing not to reply verbally.

I looked away, feeling nauseous with stress again. What did I do wrong? Why does she hate me? I took an admitedly shaky breath and sighed.

“Paris,” I said slowly, once again risking everything to establish something between us. “I want us to be honest with each other.” How ironic, when I was lying to him as we spoke? Kissing Romeo when he wasn’t around, craving the touch of a man that I never had a chance of openly being with..

”Stop. Please, Juliet. Stop.” I craned my neck towards the sky, letting the bloody red sunset bathe me in its color. “You don’t want honesty from me. You’ve made it clear you don’t want anything from me. Do we really have to pretend?” I kept my voice steady, but a mix of fear and sadness threatened to overwhelm me with every word.

My hands tightened into fists beneath the table. "I don't know what I'm supposed to say to that…" I sighed, forcing my eyes to remain on his. "But I do want honesty from you. And I don't hate or dislike you."

“Juliet…” I breathed out her name like a curse, the weight of my outburst cementing me into my own grave. “How can I be honest with you if you’ll never be honest with me?”

I'm sorry… I thought, as I plastered yet more lies into each sentence I spoke. "And what makes you think that, Paris? What would I lie to you about?"

Romeo.

I scanned Juliet’s face for any hint of lying. Either she was the most skilled liar I’d ever met or she was telling the truth. As I came to this conclusion and decided to trust the more reliable answer, guilt pooled in my stomach. I looked away, unable to meet her gaze any longer. “I apologize for acting rashly.” I mumbled courteously, my palms starting to sweat. “I’m afraid I may not be in the best of health at the moment. Perhaps we should go.” I think I’m going insane…

"You don't need to apologize," I told him, voice softening as guilt and shame flooded my conscience, I could barely keep looking at him as it was.. "Your concerns are valid. If you'd like to leave, we can, but I don't mind either way."

I'm sorry… none of this is your fault..

“Can we go sit in the limousine for awhile? I think there’s food and stuff in the back. I… I can’t go home quite yet.” I fidgeted with the cheap plastic tablecloth, poking holes in it with my fingers.

"Yes, let's," I agreed softly, wiping my hands off on my napkin before rising from my seat. Through a nearly Herculean effort, I managed to keep the guilt from my features, but every time I looked back at him… it only increased.

I heaved myself to my feet, grabbed my wallet and leaving a fifty underneath my glass to fully cover the meal and give the waiter a handsome tip. With a shaky breath I pawed at my eyes, trying to force some level of alertness into my brain. After releasing a defeated sigh, I waited patiently for Juliet,

We descended through the restaurant, far too close to each other for comfort while somehow remaining too far to act convincingly in love. When we exited into the cool night air once more, I swallowed the lump in my throat, mentally braced myself, then forced my hand to move and slip into Paris's while I pulled him in the direction of the limousine.

I flinched as her hand grasped mine, but forced myself to relax as Juliet gently tugged me along. “I don’t deserve you.” I murmured, squeezing her hand for comfort.

Don't say that, I begged him internally, Anything but that. Anything at all.

But I merely plastered a bashful smile onto my face and ducked my head in a way I hoped was convincing. "You're a really sweet guy, Paris…"

I didn’t respond, still feeling guilty and a little insane. When will I ever get this right? Thoughts bubbled to the surface—dark ones. Ones I wanted to throw away. Thoughts telling me to flee from this. Telling me to do the impossible, something insane I could never act on. I tried to block them out, a shuddering breath escaping my lips.

Once we were inside the back of the limousine, I eased Paris into a seat, steeling my nerves before settling beside him. "You look unwell, Paris.. is there anything you need?"

“I don’t know what I want anymore.” I stared blankly in front of me, trying to put the pieces together. All I really understood out of all of this was the deep fears encroaching on my heart, dark tendrils wrapping around—strangling and squeezing.

Strangely I found myself asking what Romeo would say in this situation. If I was going to fake my way through the part of the comforting lover, I had to at least make it convincing. And, either way, I felt bad for the guy. To an extent, I understood how he felt.

So, before I could regret anything, I was cupping his cheek in one hand, letting my thumb rub soothing circles into the soft skin. "I know…" I murmured, "Try not to think about it too much. It hurts more that way.. Is there anything I can do for you right now?"

I suppressed my instinct to flinch away and instead rested my head in the palm of her hand. I don’t deserve her. Now one thought. Like a skipping record on repeat. Even so, my eyes started to shut of their own accord, and I didn’t do anything to stop them. “I think you’re right.” I sighed softly. “I think too much.”

Every instinct I possessed screamed at me to yank my hand away, to push myself backwards and get away from this man who I had barely just met. But I forced my hand to lie flat, gently pushing him back against the seat. "Rest, Paris… Rest your head, you need it."

I grumbled incoherently in protest, weakly pushing back before losing resistance and curling up against the seat. It didn’t take long before I was out again evenloped in darkness.

I breathed a sigh of relief the moment of piece, moving away from Paris until I was seated on the opposite end of the seats. If he asked, I'd tell him I was afraid of accidentally kicking and waking him up. I just…. I couldn't stand to be near him right now, or my guilt would crush me.

Rather than let that happen, I pulled my phone from my back pocket and sent a text to Romeo.

JULIET: help