forum I need help

Started April 23, 2019 by @Periwinkle_

tune

How do you write an intense moment in a story without it being fast paced or rushed or cheesy?

That’s a good question… what kind of intense moment are we talking about in this case?

I’ve got a RP going rn and there’s this girl and a guy who like eachother but aren’t satin bc they’ve got more important stuff to do. The girl tends to be really positive and hopeful, while the guy tends to be a realist. I can link certain pages of the RP if you want.

Yeah, that would be great!

These are just a basic idea of how their interactions usually go

Btw I’m deleted user I had to get a new account lol

Ooh, I like this one! Really good RP!

I didn’t read all of it, but I think I read enough to get the story. Where in the story is the intense scene going to be, tho? Or did you just want general advice?

What I like to do when writing any kind of intense scene is focusing a lot on the characters thoughts. Like, if the scene is really intense in the way that things are going really fast around the character, then make the characters thoughts short and maybe incomplete because they are interrupted by something. If the scene is intense in the way that two characters feel strong attraction to each other, then maybe focus some more on the character noticing tiny details about the other person that others might not notice. Maybe it’s a bit cheesy, but it’s a great way of showing affection without actually saying like ”this person thought that person was hot” or something. Since Farron is hurt, maybe make Azura notice that he is kind of hiding that he is in pain so that she won’t worry about him…

Or if you want a really intense and romantic scene between them, make Azura take care of his injuries and have them discuss some kind of really deep stuff or whatever.

Sorry if that wasn’t the kind of answer you wanted haha… It’s a bit hard to give a good response when I don’t know exactly which scene you wanted advice on, but I hope it helped a bit anyways!

This is really good advice, thank you! I always find myself kinda stumbling through responses when they’re supposed to be having an intense moment together, and I think this will help.