Yeah, idk. Is this excessive? He has an almost constant stutter that's worse when he's excited or agitated… I just introduced him into the story and realized this might be a problem.
“Well…” he paused, trying to think of the right words, before blurting out, “The whole village thinks I sto –I sto –I took rations. Or they’re g-going to. Because some of the rations are missing. That I did –didn’t take.” He took another deep breath and painstakingly bit out, “I wanted General Nyir to help me. But then I saw Sacia and you followed her. I knew you two are my friends, almost. Kind of. Maybe?” He shook his head, waving away the extraneous thoughts. “Plea…please help?”
Was that hard to read? Or really exhausting? Any tips to make it flow better without sacrificing his stutter?
I think it’s pretty good. One of my characters has a stutter. If possible, find footage of DJ from The Last Jedi. He stutters, but it’s not distracting or excessive.
Hmm. I guess at time it could get a bit irritating, but i'm sure people will look past it and get used to it. I have a kid in my class who is like my closest guy friend and he has a natural stutter. I rarely even notice its there unless he is stutter for a long time. And it gets worse when hes really happy or excited. Its really bad with his I's lol. He'll be talking saying something and it'll be like 'i-i-i-ii-i–i-i-i-i-ii-i-i–i-i-ii-i–ii–' and just keep going. That is the only time I notice it.
But anyways, Like I said, I think most people will look past it, though it could get a bit annoying to read if its in the middle of a fast pace seen.
I think the best way would be to have them stutter at the beginning of words so that it's not interrupting the sentence flow or feel unnecessary. For example; "The whole village thinks I-I-I stole rations. Or they're g-going to." That sort of thing.
Stuttering is not just repeating the first letter/syllable of a word. (This is someone with a natural stutter, so hopefully it helps!) When someone is anxious or excited, they might go back a bit and repeat or forget words. "The whole vil-, um, village, t-the whole village thinks I st-stole, uh, t-t-took rations. Or…o-or they're going to. Because some of the, um, the rations? A-are missing. They're m-missing. W-which I didn't! I d-didn't take. Them. The r-rations." That's a little excessive, but I hope it demonstrated my point.
As a person with a natural stutter, it’s not just first letters and syllables, as thatscoolbcididntwanttoanyway said. It’s, actually, mainly repeating words or phrases. You should have maybe a combination of both. Like this, “h-h-hey everyone. I-I-I-I just wanted-wanted to intro-introduce myself. I am-am-am K-k-k-Kara and I really need- need- need a n-n-n-nap.” I hope this helps!
