So here's a place to post extremely weird conversations you've had with your friends or overheard. Has to be actual conversations.
So here's one:
"How many times has [your brother] tried to stab you?"
"Three times"
"…OK. And how many times have you tried to stab him?"
"Like 80"
"That's alright then?"
(I swear my friend is not Loki)
"Ugh im lazy"
"But wernt you already lazy?"
"but now its official"
"You are really weird"
"Coming from you, that's an honour"
"I know" thumbs up
"So are you called 'John' or 'Jonathan'?"
"Jonathan."
"Of course you are. You can't just go by 'John' you selfish S.O.B."
Loses pencil
"Can I borrow a pencil?"
"God you're so stressful"
"I'm stressful??? You're the one who called the office during third hour to call me to our locker cause you couldn't get it open"
My friend and I have so many conversations like this
She loves telling me I'm stressful
Dad - "The 'human' in Japanese on your pants proves you are a normal human."
Me - change into plain black leggings "No it doesn't"