So, I have a mild anxiety disorder, but I know it's not the same as depression. I know that depression isn't just feeling sad, it's a disease that messes with the "happy chemicals" in your brain. It can often lead to exhaustion, loss of interest and suicidal thoughts. Please tell me if I'm wrong or missing anything and any tips on how to incorporate this into a character's daily life? Thanks!
Depression is kind of complicated… First of all, a depressed person can feel it. There's just something off about the day. Things might not taste as good as usual, or might not be as fun. (there's nothing different about the taste or activity, but there's less enjoyment) Second, sad thoughts/encounters multiply the sadness levels (but not crazily), and sometimes they can get lost thinking about everything wrong. Third, good days do not make everything all better magically. (You can write conflict where other characters think that they do.) There can be days where you almost forget the character is depressed. Also, good things can happen, but then the day can go side ways real fast.
This is all I could think of. I hope it helps. Good luck.
Depression can have different effects on different people. both you and Isabel have definitely hit the big points that will generally effect everyone with depression. another aspect to consider is irrational thinking. An example would be my personal experience with situational depression (it was NOT full force depression but still there, anyways…) I felt no one cared and did not want to hang out with me, which didn't help mental state. However, I look back and I was isolating myself so much that I was making no effort to be with my friends (so they probably more thought I was just busy with school-in college). From everything that is going wrong may make them feel worse, a small thing goes wrong and it does not feel good-makes it harder to become a good day (to a degree, don't go too far with this-depends on person's life experiences, situations they are in-finances, family dynamics (good vs. bad), little nuances in life, surrounded by understanding people vs. no support). They may not reach out to others and open up because they feel they will be and are a burden; in saying this, they may have good family and support system but not open up and therefore hiding it from everyone. I have a friend where everything just overwhelmed her that she literally shut down, she wanted to speak and was forming sentences in her mind but her body or something would not allow her to speak when she was with a friend. I am a mental Health nurse aid and a nursing student so please let me know if you have more questions-I can pull up my PPT. and personal knowledge/experience to help if you'd like!! no matter how small the concern may be about the character and/or story.
if you would incorporate suicidal thoughts, it may depend on how suicidal you would make your character. I thought about it once but I immediately corrected my thoughts knowing I could never go through with it, knowing (not necessarily feeling) that people cared for me and would be hurt terribly if I ever followed through. i knew and felt that my family cared for me. (I drive on interstate that has lakes by the road, one severe turn/push of the wheel, and….yeah, BUT I NEVER went further than that one second thought!) On the other hand, I know someone who has attempted multiple times and has just given up trying because of different factors. if severe depression: it would be thinking not many, if any, care about him/her, being a burden on family (emotionally/financially/mentally), etc. sorry if I am not that much help-but I hope this does help form some ideas in how to portray daily life.
I do not know for sure how much I actually know about the subject, but from the things I've been through myself/am going through right now/read online or in books/talked about with multiple friends who have been diagnosed with depression, I see it this way:
A lot of times people tell others that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, right? When you have depression, the actual illness, not the 'mood' so many teenagers tend to have when they have a lot of homework, you don't see that light. The tunnel just looks like an endless, dark road without end.
Of course, there are multiple versions of depression and sometimes it can bring other things - like insomnia, for example - with itself as well.
It also depends on your character's brain. As you might know, depression doesn't need a reason. It's a chemical unbalance in your brain. Many people are unaware of this (hence why a certain amount of people are always surprised when famous artists are dealing with, or even pass away from depression/suicide. They have a perfect life, right? But that doesn't change anything in their brains, it might even make it worse)
But insomnia, for example, tends to occur more for people with a high IQ, for they are unable to shut off their brain. They are always thinking, their mind is constantly working, which robs them of their sleep.
Lastly (sorry this is so long idek if I'm making sense), people who suffer from depression often get the feeling that they are not worth it. They start caring less about taking care of themselves because they feel like they are not worth it. They apologise a lot, are afraid that they annoy people, etc, etc.
Depression is an exhausting illness. Especially if your character has a daily job or goes to school, they have to fight their own mind every single day. Getting up from bed can be insanely hard, for they would rather stay asleep, and sometimes they wish to not even wake up anymore. They lose interest in things they used to love and feel like they have nothing in life to look forward to. Almost nothing brings them joy. Of course, sometimes there are good days, but depression is quite a nasty illness that doesn't randomly leave your brain (sadly)
Okay, this is really the last thing (sorry lelz):
A lot of times, people who struggle with depression call for attention. Not in a bad way, but in a way that's more a cry for help than anything else. They might let off that they're feeling bad, in real life or they post it on social media. They might make small, seemingly harmless comments to their friends a lot, in the hopes that somebody will notice: ''I haven't eaten today'' ''I barely slept last night'' ''I'm so tired''. They often hope that someone will notice and will be there for them.
I hope this was of help, sorry if it didn't make a lot of sense. My own head is a bit full of a lot of things at the moment, so I keep losing my train of thoughts mid-sentence lmaoo
^.^
(this is of course from my point of view in life, so if I'm horribly wrong about something, please do tell me and I sincerely apologise in advance if that's the case…
…stay strong everyone, you're all amazing, we can all get through the bad shizzles! c:)
oH one more thing, a lot of people don't understand that depression is an actual illness. There is very little awareness of mental health problems in our society, and when, for example, a friend of the character doesn't understand the seriousness of the illness, it can have quite a bad effect on your character. This often stimulates the bad feelings (sad, hopeless, lost, tired etc) and it will make your character often feel extremely lonely.
Hope this helped a bit! Good luck with writing :)
Also, I don't know if this was stated before.
Depression is often confused for laziness, which can make someone with depression feel worse. A close friend of mine has Depression and I know what not to say. I know it doesn't magically go away but I know that it can have high days and low days. I stick by her on the times where she is at a low. These times can stay for a while. Don't be afraid to ask someone what it's like. Ask someone with depression to review your book and tell you if you're portraying it right or wrong. Sorry for my mini rant.
Sometimes, when undiagnosed, depression can lead people suffering from the disorder feeling that there's something "wrong" with them. They may struggle to enjoy the things they once enjoyed, have difficulties keeping a job, and may feel no motivation to do things they either know they needed to do or do things they wanted to do at one point.
People suffering from depression have a tendency to cut themselves off from the world around them when it's at their worst, though some may be better at handling their illness and function without other people even being remotely aware of their depression.
When I was depressed, my therapist told me to I needed to just, you know, be happy. She told me to smile and try going out and doing things. That, perhaps, is the one thing people suffering from depression hate to hear most. Depression is not a "choice" like society tends to believe it is. People don't just suddenly "become happy". There may be happy times where the person suffering from depression may feel they're getting better, only for their emotions to break at the first sign of despair.
Also, suicidal thoughts don't necessarily have to be a part of depression. Many people might envision how things might be if they DID take their life and may think they're "better off dead", but that doesn't have to equate to them actively planning or seriously considering taking their lives. While I suffered from heavy depression, I /knew/ I wasn't going to kill myself because I didn't have it in me to do that.
So I have depression and it can take many different forms. It could be insomnia, it could be just feeling bleh, it could be anything. For me, it's a mix of insomnia and feeling off. Like, I know it's there and I can sense it, but for me, it takes the form of seeing things differently, things not tasting the same, etc. People might feel happy for a minute, but they know that the depression is still there. Some days are bad, some days are good. Mine is like my shadow in a way in that it follows me everywhere. It's not as strong as it used to be, but it's still there. I mean, there are so many different ways of expressing it that it's hard to write it.
Depression doesn't always equal suicidal thoughts, but for me, it did equal that. If you want your character to have suicidal thoughts, then it could either be that they know that they're going to do it, like me in the worst part of it, or they can want to and know they don't have it in them, like me when my depression started.
I hope this helps!
It can also feel like you just don't want to do anything. Usually people that are depressed have thoughts also about self harm and things like that.
I have been diagnosed with depression, and for me, it creates a void of energy, so, say I feel really really bad that day, I could have no energy for anything whatsoever, and that greatly impacts my life. I sometimes try to do things that usually help me get motivation or energy to do things, and it just disappears (why I said "a void"). I have never thought of self-harm really, but I have contemplated suicide, which is usually different for every person. For me, I haven't ever acted upon those thoughts. Depression can also make you very unmotivated, which happened to me. It also makes it hard to take care of my personal hygiene sometimes, which is also a problem. I'm tired, hope this helps. I also have insomnia.