forum Heyo! I need some help.

Started November 23, 2018 by Deleted user

tune

How does one know if they are being emotionally abused?

I just feel like people around me may be doing it without realizing but, I don't want to jump the gun…

I have to leave for now, but I would like to hear some examples of what you’re thinking might be emotional abuse.

You see, I don't have examples…
I need examples..

I have some examples.

From my life. From what I think is unfair, if you’d like to hear them.

Please.

Okay so mainly it’s my father. My mom’s always off at work, which I think, frustrates him a bit. And made him very lazy. And reliant on me.

One of these times is when he wanted me to make some queso for him, with some stuff he got. I make it no problem, with his instruction and bring him the bowl.

He says, by word and from my memory, “I can’t take it from there! Put it on a plate or in a bowl!”

And I’m like, okay, makes sense. So I grab a PLATE because it’s conservative of our dishware. And I bring it over and he gives me this look.

Then he says, by my memory, “I said put it in a bowl! What are you, stupid?”

Okay. Okay.

So I go put it in a bowl, chewing on my tongue to stop tears. And I bring him the bowl and he says,
“Finally. Now was that so hard?”

I'm here darling!

Okay so…

• Calling you stupid or other negative/bad things, especially if it’s frequent and there’s no way they’re joking
• Over-monitoring. Like… do they watch your every move? Read your texts or emails? Require account passwords? Anything of that nature?
• Dismissing all of your negative emotions and acting like you shouldn’t have them/telling you to get over it
• Ignoring you as if you’ve done something wrong, even though you haven’t
• Controlling your appearance, especially hair (forcing you to keep it long, or forcibly cutting it off). Also anything along the lines of “you can’t wear that, it makes you look like a [insert derogatory term of your choice here], or calling you ugly/criticizing your appearance
• Denying someone help with their mental health, either telling them that it’s not real, telling them to get over it, or telling them to pray it away, etc (not saying prayer is bad, but for mental health issues, it isn’t really going to be enough)
• Playing victim when confronted- even gently confronted
• Frequently shouting at you over little things, unnecessary anger or aggression, or threats towards you.
• Guilting you for doing things/into doing things/out of things

This is just a little list of examples. Hopefully it helps some…