My friend was Ursula in a recent musical we did in our Jr. High (The Little Mermaid Jr.), and a month after the play was over we still refer to each other and comment about each other as our character. (I was the water… lol) So me and some of my buddies were talking in English class the play came up. Friend B turns to Friend A (Ursula) and asks her if she has ever had calamari. Friend A says yes and Friend C jokes that she must be a cannibal then. They get it. Not me though. Friend A, B, and C are laughing and I just kinda have that 'I really don't get it' look on my face. Friend A turns to me and notices that I have no clue what just happened.
"You don't get it, do you"
I shake my head.
"You know, since I was Ursula and Ursula is an octopus/squid lady and calamari is squid."
Blank stare…
"You know, since I ate squid and I am a squid that makes me a cannibal."
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH."
And that is how my friends learned I'm secretly a stupid little child.
We were playing this game in class were one person in the class leaves the room and the rest decides on something they will all do when that person comes back. When the persons comes back, they will ask the others questions and try to guess what the rest of them has decided on. For example, tapping your pen while answering, always hesitate before answering, cough while the person next to you answers and stuff like that.
So this time we had decided that our answers had to start with the third letter in our name. If I (Alex) got asked a question I then had to answer something that began with an e. So my friend Måns was supposed to be the guesser, and Simon was asked a question. For example you could ask a really simple question to see if the person would lie so that their answer would fit in.
Måns: Simon, how old are you?
Simon: …
Simon: * slightly panicing *
Simon: * has no idea of what to say that starts with an M *
Simon: * yells * MADAGASKAR!!!
Class: * laughs *
Simon: Sorry ya'll I paniced okay
It's more of an inside joke than anything else, but it practically killed my one friend when I said it.
Once upon a time, in a small high school Chemistry class, two friends sat side-by-side as the teacher was up front, pointing at the powerpoint on the board and explaining gas laws (fun fun). One such student by the name of Circe looks down upon her notebook and discovers that she is running out of room on her paper as she scribbles down notes pertaining to the lesson. She notices, like the observant student that she is, that all of the laws are named after a person. She silently hopes that there are no more laws so that all of her notes stay on one page.
Sadly, it is not to be. The teacher turns to the next slide, and there is yet another law for the students to learn. Circe, with a dramatic sigh, flips to the next page, uttering, "I don't got room for all these people," under her breath in an unplanned sarcastic whine. Her friend, by the name of Sunny, mocks her in a strange but oddly humorous tone.
And thus two 10th graders start dying of laughter from the stupidest thing ever.
The End
My family and I were out downtown getting pizza, and we sat and talked a bit once we were all done eating. My little brother, who was sitting on my lap at that point for some reason, says something that brings up the subject of girls and relationships. So my dad ask me, "You see any girls here he could get with?" Immediately, I go "nope" and I guess that set off everything. At one point, while they're giving ideas on how to "properly" approach a girl, Mom brought up an example of similar interests and if the girl my bro approaches says something about the Pokemon shirt he's wearing.
"Yeah, that would be nice, if she comments nicely on your Pikachu shirt."
Bro nods, having not really been taking it as seriously as the rest of us, then out of freaking nowhere, puts up finger guns and does that cool guy head-up nod.
"Lemme peek-at-chu."
And Dad is smiling really hard and snickering, Mom is hanging her head, and I'm just hugging my bro and laughing into his shirt.
My sister was telling me i should talk to one of her friends because we were in similar situations and might be able to help each other. I was arguing that broaching the topic would be really difficult, especially as I hadn't talked to this person in ages.
"Do you just expect me to go up to her and say: Hi! Do you still have residual feelings for someone in your periphery? Good because so do I and i don't know how to stop, either."
We laughed about that for a good minute, and she dropped the suggestion, thankfully.
My brother dived into the backseat like a seal into water when a girl he claimed was "just a friend" walked by and my mom was opening the car window to shout hi and embarrass him.
It was pure gold.
Friend A: "I hate that you're talking about me like I'm not there."
Friend B: "Well you might as well not be; you're dead to me."
Okay, so my brother god I love him to death had this Congo with my dad.
Brother: Why do you feel full after swimming?
Dad: Because you swallow more water than you think.
Bro: Oh. I thought the water came in through your belly button.
Dad: (°_°)
Important note: my brother was twelve at the time. XD
(That's still deeply concerning… even if he was twelve…)
(He… He's not the brightest.)
Line from a fanfiction I read once that I quote whenever possible:
Bee guts? Energy? Fur?
To one of my friends: "Mike Meyers plays multiple characters with much variety in personality, voice, and overall character. Even the Cat in the Hat, who can manipulate his universe at will. This makes him the most Austin powerful being in the universe."
