Ugh I’ve gone through so many drafts of this in my head. Here we go…
So, I, as a female, believe that I might have a crush on another female. Not really sure, as I have never had a crush on anyone before in my life. Sadly, this isn’t really something I can talk about with my irl friends, and my parents are Christians, which would make that whole conversation even more awkward. So of course, I turn to Notebook. Anyway, I need help figuring this out, whether I’m lesbian, straight, or bisexual. I say bisexual as I have been physically attracted to guys before, mostly in movies, but now that I think about it probably a few girls too. I guess I just don’t understand anything like this, and any help or advice from you Notebookians would be amazing!
hey kiddo, go on the LGBT chat, we can talk to u over there and more ppl will see it
I posted a link there, honestly I much prefer having a separate chat for this as otherwise the discussion can get lost in the comments.
This was me like a year ago. I went through so many different labels. I thought I was asexual and biromantic, and demi-sexual and homoromantic, and bisexual, and pansexual, (still kinda figuring that one out tbh) and lithosexual and so many different combinations. I was wondering if I was actually sexually attracted to people, if I was actually romantically attracted to people, if I was attracted to girls, if I was attracted to guys, etc. Right now I identify as bisexual, but it took a long time to get here.
Is having a label that makes sense to you important to you?
This was me like a year ago. I went through so many different labels. I thought I was asexual and biromantic, and demi-sexual and homoromantic, and bisexual, and pansexual, (still kinda figuring that one out tbh) and lithosexual and so many different combinations. I was wondering if I was actually sexually attracted to people, if I was actually romantically attracted to people, if I was attracted to girls, if I was attracted to guys, etc. Right now I identify as bisexual, but it took a long time to get here.
Is having a label that makes sense to you important to you?
^ Exactly. It's a process, and there's nothing wrong with realizing 'hey, maybe I'm actually X' after identifying as Y for a while. I thought I was straight, then het-ace, then bi-ace, then pan-ace, then poly-ace, then lesbian-ace, and now I would say that I'm bi/possibly demiromantic asexual.
If you have any questions about your sexuality then as you know, like a liar said many people in the LGBTQ+ community are there to tell you about their experiences and I have been there too and If you need to say some more then you can PM me if you want. BTW I am also Bisexual…
This was me like a year ago. I went through so many different labels. I thought I was asexual and biromantic, and demi-sexual and homoromantic, and bisexual, and pansexual, (still kinda figuring that one out tbh) and lithosexual and so many different combinations. I was wondering if I was actually sexually attracted to people, if I was actually romantically attracted to people, if I was attracted to girls, if I was attracted to guys, etc. Right now I identify as bisexual, but it took a long time to get here.
Is having a label that makes sense to you important to you?
^ Exactly. It's a process, and there's nothing wrong with realizing 'hey, maybe I'm actually X' after identifying as Y for a while. I thought I was straight, then het-ace, then bi-ace, then pan-ace, then poly-ace, then lesbian-ace, and now I would say that I'm bi/possibly demiromantic asexual.
I also thought I was going to be trans because I felt more like X but then I realize that I was ok having X and Y genders so yeah happens to everyone.
This was me like a year ago. I went through so many different labels. I thought I was asexual and biromantic, and demi-sexual and homoromantic, and bisexual, and pansexual, (still kinda figuring that one out tbh) and lithosexual and so many different combinations. I was wondering if I was actually sexually attracted to people, if I was actually romantically attracted to people, if I was attracted to girls, if I was attracted to guys, etc. Right now I identify as bisexual, but it took a long time to get here.
Is having a label that makes sense to you important to you?
^ Exactly. It's a process, and there's nothing wrong with realizing 'hey, maybe I'm actually X' after identifying as Y for a while. I thought I was straight, then het-ace, then bi-ace, then pan-ace, then poly-ace, then lesbian-ace, and now I would say that I'm bi/possibly demiromantic asexual.
I also thought I was going to be trans because I felt more like X but then I realize that I was ok having X and Y genders so yeah happens to everyone.
i've given up on figuring out genders
Idk why I'm replying to this now, no one's gonna see it, but I kinda wanted to leave an update just for posterity or something. The absolute WAVE of nostalgia and memories that hit me reading this thread, oh goodness. It's fun to revisit and to think about the stuff that has changed. I don't think younger me ever got the chance to see all your replies cause I lost my access to Notebook, but it's nice reading them now after I've figure everything out.
Also did I REALLY, REALLY have the AUDACITY to say I'd felt attracted to men before?!!??! OHMYGOD little Darkblossom you were so delusional XD. I don't think I knew how the difference between aesthetic and actual, physical attraction felt, after this past absolutely freeing year it's so bizarre to remember I thought I was bi, like nah girl you are a through and through lesbian, it just took a bit to get out of the denial.
(Just commenting to say that I did see this and…lol, in the few years since 2019 I also figured out more aspects about myself, like how I’m
- not straight (I knew I was asexual for a long time, but for so long I called myself heteromantic…Nah I’m biromantic
- not cis (I’m still not sure 100% what i am but I call myself nonbinary since it’s easier to explain to a lot of people)
Safe to say I think that a lot of members of Notebook have gone through similar things!)
Hey. I'm still figuring this stuff out. I've been through so many labels. At first it was Bi, then Pan, then Bi/Ace, then Pan/Ace. I'm currently with Pan/Ace/Poly, questioning Aro/Ace. And don't even get me started on gender identity. i've been through more genders then I can count of both hands. It's okay to be confused. It's ok to not know quite yet. But you will. Eventually you'll find an identity that you created yourself. one that suits you, whether it be lesbian, or something else. Just know that my PM box is always a safe space, and always available
(lol i just read through the enire thing. Glad you figured it out. My offer still stands. I'm almost always on!)
I appreciate the offer :) Knowing there's a community here on Notebook full of people who understand and can relate to pretty much any part of my experience has been comforting. Most of yall have had much more complicated journeys than me even, I got to skip out on any gender identity struggles lol. I think I've got it really lucky overall tbh, especially now compared to when I was younger!
That's good that you can apreciate what you got lucky on. I'm proud of you!
As someone who went through that process, I'll tell you right now that bisexuality can be whatever proportion of attraction you feel. It doesn't have to be 50/50 like I thought the name implied, and frankly, it's all about "you do you."
Idk why I'm replying to this now, no one's gonna see it, but I kinda wanted to leave an update just for posterity or something. The absolute WAVE of nostalgia and memories that hit me reading this thread, oh goodness. It's fun to revisit and to think about the stuff that has changed. I don't think younger me ever got the chance to see all your replies cause I lost my access to Notebook, but it's nice reading them now after I've figure everything out.
Also did I REALLY, REALLY have the AUDACITY to say I'd felt attracted to men before?!!??! OHMYGOD little Darkblossom you were so delusional XD. I don't think I knew how the difference between aesthetic and actual, physical attraction felt, after this past absolutely freeing year it's so bizarre to remember I thought I was bi, like nah girl you are a through and through lesbian, it just took a bit to get out of the denial.
this was me a couple years ago lmao,, took me way too long to realize
