@miccoc lets do this.
-For the hair, how does she wear it? Bun, pony tail, braid?
-I am just wondering by what you mean "keep the scar" in identifying marks? Because you don't get to keep or get rid of a scar, as a choice. Is there another explanation, or purpose?
-Mannerisms, needs lots more. Try adding: commonly said phrases. accent. common movements. the way they hold them self. the way the act in situations (phrases and movements)
-Any other talents? Considering you mentioned she has medical stuff, any medical talents?
-For hobbies, what kind of books does she read? And what do you mean by climbing? Try adding another hobby even, possibly one that even contradicts her personality, keeps the character fun, and gives them depth.
-You should add some personality, for easier visualization. Is she shy? Loud? Funny? What kind of vibe does she give? Elaborate.
-What is her relationship with her husband like?
-I think overall in nature, you could add more? just a suggestion ;)
-Good background. Simple but significant. Gives a good view of her past, and why she has the jobs she does.
-Now that I look on your notes, there is a lot there! Yay, an oreo for you ;) Consider moving the notes into nature? All of it belongs in there ;)
-What is her clothing like? Describe different outfits for different setting.
-What is her taste in music? Maybe vene ty giving her something that contradicts what she seems to be like, ex: shes a screamo fan.
I like your character. Just needs a bit more work! Good job! Please know I am not trying to be rude or bring you down at all in this. Tell me what you think of what I said, and new what you will keep and toss!
See ya! ;)
She will sometimes have it in a ponytail when she is working but usually just has he hair down.
So for the scar, time is set in the future. With better medicine and tech, people can(and usually do) have the option to get rid of scars. While many people get rib of them it serves as a reminder for her that while progress is making people live longer and healthier, you can still die and get hurt.
-For the mannerisms: yes that is true(something still a work in progress and I will use that to make it a lot better and clearer)
main talents is her medical skills for one: she created a tech that goes into your eyes to help you scan a body(for better use in surgery and medical practices). She also made a tech that and give people the ability to regrow their limbs. So we already have the blueprint of how our bodies should look like(which is why most of us come out with both arms and legs and our organs in the right place). It is basically a robotic arm or leg(or what ever piece of the body that is missing{aside from the head of course}) that attaches to the body different synthetic parts that "guide" the brain and body to regrow the missing piece and as the body grows itself, the robotic tech degrades and goes away. So when you are fully healed it is your body part not a synthetic-metal look alike.
I did not consider that! I will work deeper on that hobby section.
I'll better on that personality. Thank you for those examples
Their relationship is like two kids just falling in love and they have the wisdom due to their challenges(losing two children). They act like kids at heart. There's more to it however I will need to word it better in the future so that it is understandable.
Thanks! I wasn't sure where to organize it so I put it all in notes :) Okay I will work on all of these then! Thank you so much! It is fine! This exactly what I need so that I can fill in the blanks Can't catch everything if I am only looking from my own perspective! :)
@luna, so can you please pick maybe one character for now? Ill do the others later ;) thanks
No problem! Could you do my boy Anthony? Thank you so much! Anthony Ross Rare
Oh hello! I was wondering if you'd like to critique my character, Vioetta. I already polished her up and completed the base of her character so I'd like some extra improvements!
She's an anthromorphic wolf (They're called alillians in my story) and she's an anti-social bandita who was heavily influenced by her bandit friend.
