forum Take a look at my villains, please? qwq

Started February 02, 2019 by @Kinarymo

tune

I've never written villains before, so these boys are my first ever attempt at writing a villain.
Be brutal if you have to qwq
Hiryur Akoai - Hiryur Akoai
Virion Torran - Virion Torran

I really like them

honestly i can't find any problems!! they're super detailed and well-developed, good work

Wow, I'm surprised by how well thought out these are. They seem like interesting people who give of a sense of danger but who are to charming to want to avoid completely.
What would Hiryur do if he encounters an opponent who refuses to follow his idea of a fair fight, like so many shounen protagonists who will still fight the last boss while having two broken arms and bleeding to death? Or if this opponent was a lot stronger and hellbent on murdering him?
I really want to know where the story your writing is about and I want to know more about their development.

I'm surprised by everyone's response right now, i personally thought they were so damn flawed, thank u all YwY
@"M.W.Poel" As for Hiryur, in the first case, he'll just walk away, no questions asked.
In the second case, he would probably avoid that kind of fight - he's in for the fun, not for a chance to get killed. If the enemy is persistent, he will probably ask Virion to get rid of it
I'll try and post the story somewhere once i fix it QwQ
Until then, i'll keep posting characters here o3o
Ty so much all of u YwY

Hey, I'm a little late but I took a look at your characters and have some critique.
They're very interesting and really cool to look at. I like the small, relatable characteristics in them.
As for critique, the one thing I've seen with both characters is not uncommon. It kind of looks like you took a list of generally labeled "evil" characteristics and slapped them on a page. I'm sure this is far from what you did but still. They're both calculating and just have this sinisterness about them that isn't really realistic. Genuine malice is quite hard to come by. To be fair, I dont know much about these characters but I do have a suggestion. For future villains, change up the color schemes and personalities a bit. Stray from blacks and purples and challenge yourself with orange and green. Most importantly though, ask "Why."
Why is, I feel, the most important question to ask when creating any character, especially villains. Find out their motivations, what drives them. Don't just say "well, because they're evil" because even Hitler's motivation was "because I'm evil." What does your villain believe is right? What was their past like? Soon you'll find that you don't hate your villain. You might even like them or feel bad for them.
Anyway, that's my villain speech. Good luck! Cactis out.