forum please critique my characters
Started by @captain-universe
tune

people_alt 3 followers

@Suspicious_Reptiles

*Estelle Gaumond
-Overview
Where did the name ‘Estelle Gaumond’ come from?
-Looks
Can you describe her body type better? I don’t really know what you mean by just straight. Also does she have any identifying marks? Anything that would make her stand out from others?
-Nature
What does she do with different emotions? What does she do when she’s bored or scared, or disgusted? Does she have any other flaws or hobbies? What does she do in her spare time that makes her calm or happy? Does she have any prejudices? Anything that she just doesn’t like because she was just raised that way?
-Social
Does she have a religion or politics? Getting a good look at what her religion is what she believes is right gives us a better feel for her that is harder to explain in any other way.
-History
Can you tell me more about her academic history, or how she meet her friends? Maybe a thing that happened that helped shape who she is today? Just give me something else others might find trivial but really is important to a person.

*Henry Gunn
-Overview
Does he have any nicknames? Maybe something someone impulsively calls him?
-Looks
Can you describe his hair a bit better. I know I can see it in the gallery but if you can describe it better here, you can describe it better in a book to readers. What is his body type? Also this isn’t a complaint but good golly he’s tall. Look out for doorways my dude.
-Nature
Can you tell me more? What’s his flaws, hobbies? What does he do when he’s angry or confused? How does he act around others? What is he really like?
-Social
What’s his job, favorite things, anything. I would love to hear more about this character.
-History
What book smarts does he have? His history is a bit bland and doesn’t tell us anything about him. Could you give me a more detailed version of his history?

*Buffy Alkonost
-Nature
You need to add more onto here. Just tell me what she does when she’s excited or what motivates her.
-Social
There’s nothing here. Finding out what occupation or politics a person has can give you a good deep look into what they’re really like. It’s kinda hard t explain otherwise.
-History
What did she do when she got out of the military? Is she still in the military? Did she make any friends as a kid? Did she have a good relationship with her parents?

Overall I like the characters and feel like they could lead to something really cool. Just tell me more about them.

barabara

Overall, you need to give your characters strong motivations and flaws. These are the first things to develop in a character because they should be the basis of who your character is. It sounds like you already know where you want your characters to go, but developing that is very important.
Henry needs a lot of consideration. Based on his background you could probably figure out what you want his motivations to be
Buffy has a very clear path of where you want her to go so based off of that you can see her motivations pretty clearly although they should still be stated.
Estelle has strong flaws that can balance her motivations, but I would make her motivations a bit more clear. Does she want to help stop the wars throughout the galaxies? How does this change her as a character?
I hope this helped! Happy writing!