I really love this outline. I can tell you put a ton of thought and effort into making this character. I also love the inclusion of songs that remind you of the character. I need to do that. I think my only thing would be that for the one big paragraph you have (can’t remember which part it was) would be to just break it up a little, add some like paragraph breaks. Overall I think it looks really really good. Makes me want to revisit my own characters just to add this much detail to their outlines. 😂
Ahhh, thank you so much @another_Sarcastic_writer!! I'm so glad he seems well-thought out. And yes, songs are such a good way of getting a feel for a character! Alright, yeah, that's a good idea. I'll go through and add some more paragraph breaks to make things easier on the eyes.
Now, about Amarya! (How do you pronounce her name, by the way?) First off, you've set up an intriguing character! I love that she's soft-spoken and loyal, and her powers are so interesting! There's definitely loads of room to have fun with time-related abilities, if handled well. I also think there's huge potential in her backstory, which you hinted at very briefly, but there are several aspects I wanted to see more fleshed out. One thing I would point out is that under "character flaws" you have written that she's afraid of her own abilities. That's more of a fear than a flaw, unless she allows that fear to control her unnecessarily, leading to serious consequences. However, you noted that while she is reluctant, she will still use her abilities, although she limits them significantly. I would do a little more exploration and see if she has any deeper flaws—something that could determine whether or not she attains her goals. When telling a story, you want the stakes to be significant, and weaving a character's major flaws into the story is an excellent way to showcase development, build tension, and deliver a satisfying climax. You want the most important scene to be connected to, and even hinged upon, the internal and external obstacles between her and her goals.
Some other things I would love to see fleshed out:
1) Her relationship with her father (more specific than just "he doted on her").
2) Why did this maid take her to the mortal realm? What did she stand to gain from doing this? How did she manage to steal Amarya and escape to the mortal realm anyway? Aren't there security measures put in place so stuff like this couldn't happen?
3) You mention in a throwaway line that Amarya hates people who are "two-faced" because of how the maid lied to her. How does this dislike or prejudice play out in her behaviours and actions towards others? Does she tend not to trust people? Does she have methods for finding out if they're being honest?
4) How did she discover/develop her abilities? Were they hidden from her for most of her life? How much does she remember about her father?
5) How did she find out that her abilities are dangerous? Did something happen that made her realize she needs to exercise extreme caution with her powers?
6) Does she have any internal motivations, such as a desire for inner peace, to be unique, to be secure, to be in control, etc? It's fine if her primary motivation or goal in her story is to reunite with her father, but doesn't she have any other feelings or experiences which motivate her actions?
You've got a great foundation for a compelling character overall, I would just encourage you to do a deeper dive into her character, exploring fears, motivations, desires, emotions, experiences, prejudices, and misguided perceptions. A great way to start doing this is to take a few personality tests as Amarya, read the results, and start piecing together what you've found until you have a more rounded, nuanced character.
Hope this helped!
