forum Judge this guy?

Started June 18, 2019 by @sharkfinn_ey

tune

https://www.notebook.ai/plan/characters/797486#! he's a work in progress and not finished at all! but I'd really appreciate it if someone'd take a look

I'll take a look! :)

• You're very descriptive in Looks, good job! ^^ What do you mean when you say he has "feminine legs"? Do you mean slim? Because that might contrast with what you say two lines above about them being "thicker".
• "Fingerguns and thumbs up. Started as a sarcastic thing, does this daily now." my god that is so relatable, love that detail.
• Why does he dislike dominant people? And what are you qualifying as "dominant": people who are loud, people who draw attention to themselves, people who love control (esp control over others)? Try to be more specific.
• He hates people, but you mention him having friends: what does it take for Finn to warm up to someone, to trust them? What kind of person does he like, since he seems to hate so much? Along the same lines, "Afraid to be seen as a good person, thinks he's bad and uses this to keep people at distance. Or wants to be seen that way." <– Why does he have such shitty self-esteem? Does keeping people at a distance stem from a "noble" spot of not wanting to hurt others by having them associate with him, or is he simply afraid of commitment, of closeness, somethign he may not be used to? Has he been burned before, had an esp bad experience with trusting others? What is his reason for hating people so much, other than his anxiety, which does make it harder to interact with strangers but doesn't account for a hate for humanity.
• He "wants to stay under the radar", but in Prejudices you seem to hint at him having a confrontational streak? He's able to lose his cool, then. What does it take for his anger to override his anxiety? Do "dumb and misangonystic assholes" only piss him off enough to get aggressive when it concerns him, or when it concerns someone he cares about?
• "Kind and caring to animals and small children (though he doesn't like them)." There must be a reason he's nice to them despite disliking them, why? And why does he dislike them in the first place? People who dislike other people tend to, on the contrary, feel more comfortable around animals and small children, who tend to be less judgmental.

I have a good enough image on Finn in my head, which is already a good start :) Hope this is mildly helpful, and good luck!

Looking great! The biggest things popping out at me were:
-His motivation. Why is he trying to change? What is trying to turn away from and what is he trying to turn to?
-Name. Does he have a last name? why is one of his names Sharkfinn?
-Necklace. Is there a special meaning behind it? How id he get it? Is it special or decorative? Does it hold a some sort of power, emotionally, mentally or some sort of magical power?
-Fears. Are his fears just common phobias? Or is there a backstory behind them. Why he fears something can be a big tell to personality. Why does he think he is bad? Why does he want people to see him as bad?
-Conditions. How blind is he without his glass? That can be key later in his story, say he loses them. Also i don't know what varicose is. I don't know if that's just me, but maybe explain it? I don't know maybe that one's just me. Also, is he sensitive to noise and that's why he listens to music? Or is there specific things he tries to avoid? Does he just prefer his music over normal noise?
-Mannerisms. What's in the bag?
-Flaws. These seem more like quirks. Is there flaws that he is trying to fix like you metioned in the fears part? A character with no flaws is an unbalanced one. Flaws can be in the way he interacts with others, things he doesn't like about himself, prejudices etc.
-The Rats. Where did they come from? Where do they live? Are they special? Do they hold emotional value? These guys are mysteries.
-Jobs. Scholarships aren't going to cover the costs of living. Working only twice a month at the library won't cover bills.

Other than that this is an awesome character! I love him already!

Thank you both for your advice and questions!
I have finally updated him a bit (notebook erased a lot while I saved the new information grrr..), but you can take a look at the new information if you'd like :)
Thanks again!

• That bit about his boyfriend's gift being emotional support is chefs kiss <3
• Omg the reference to the Avengers, haha, it's good thing you explain right after because some people may not even know what you're referencing ;)
• Not gonna lie, stoners tend to be some of the nicest people, I'm not surprised that's the personality type he goes for :) (And if I may, his taste in friends has NOTHING to do with Conditions haha, it would fit just fine in Personality Type tho!)
• Ah good, I understand the aggressiveness now: the sort of control and confidence that surges as soon as someone you love is in a vulnerable situation, that completely overrides any of your own anxiety. Good detail!
• I honestly like Finn so much more now haha, always sticking up for the underdog because on some levels he can relate.

Overall you did great with adding stuff and making his profile more cohesive, good job!! :) (Also hey my dad's from the Netherlands!! Veel geluk met je schrijven!)