forum Critiquing Characters!
Started by @bubblegumcity
tune

people_alt 8 followers

@bubblegumcity

Okay, so here's what I got. If I didn't name a category, then it was fine.
Overview- 👌
looks-
Needs to link race.
Tell that she probably be a mesomorph, since there is no in-between really, or you could say she is an ectomoprh mixed with a tad of mesomorph and link this https://goo.gl/images/VQ2NV1
Nature-
Tell her that she shouldn't put the 'flaws' 'hobbies' talents, etc. In lists like: "likes to swim, eat, talk," put up them in a sorry like sentence like: she loves to swim in the lakes and looks, and eats lots of food. She also enjoys striking up a conversation."
Give her a bit more talents, at least 2 or 3 more so that they are a bit even and it doesn't seem like she has so many flaws
Social-
Don't say she's 'possibly agnostic,' she either is or she isn't
Describe her favorite possession more, don't just tell us that it's 'a friendship bracelet' is it blue with stripes? Orange will dots? Detail that a bit more please
Thank you!!! This was a lot of fun!! ❤️❤️❤️

@bubblegumcity

@WriteLikeYoureRunningOutOfTime here you are! I didn't see THAT many flaws, but I tried 😄
Overview-
If she has no other names just don't fill it out, same with other things
Nature-
If shes always so angry with the dragons, don't make her deadly call. It doesn't really made sense, at least make her a bit Hot-Headed.
Social-
In speaking of the religion and favorite possession you said something about rose-colored glasses? What are they? Where did they come from? Explain those somwuere, possibly in the looks category-or make your own folder explaining clothes.
Family-
Don't forget to link the father.
^^

@bubblegumcity

@Riorlyne here you go!!
Looks-
Are her eyes in cat form and human form the same? If they are, say that. Or if you want to, you could spice it up and say that her eyes change colors if she switches.
Nature-
Don't say (including dogs) say "she does not find most animals threatening, like dogs, animal, animal
*Doing up her sister, (name)'s hair
Family-
Don't forget to link the rest of the family if you ever create them as characters. 😄
That wasn't much, but your character is very detailed and you put some interesting and helpful facts into the story. The extras folder was great!

@Riorlyne pets

@Riorlyne here you go!!

Thank you for taking a look at her! Her eyes are the one thing that doesn't change when she changes form, so I'll make sure to mention that in her profile.

As for her family, I haven't really given them names yet! She's not the main character and she won't be meeting them again in the story so they're not top of my list of characters to develop, but I will definitely give them names, at least.

Rory

Hello! I'm super new, like literally joined an hour ago and was hoping to get some advice on a character I've had for a few years now? Emery. Thank you!! Xx

@bubblegumcity

@CherryCreations here you are
Looks-
110 what? lbs? Tons?
What type of brown? She could have very light brown hair, mud brown, chocolate brown, but we may never know. Fill that out.
If she has no facial hair, don't fill it out. Same for other things like that
Skin tone is light? Just light? Light what?!
Nature-
Give her a LOT of mannerisms. Being quiet isn't necessarily a mannerism. Some examples are: shifting your weight on one foot to the other, biting nails, messing arround with hair
Her motivation is just adventure? Either detail that please or add in something more
Give her some more hobbies and talents
She needs a LOT more flaws, one is definitely not enough.
I understand that she is introverted, it is a personality trait and you thought into it well. But, give her some more personality and DETAIL than just saying "Introverted".
Social-
Any specific types of fruit?
History-
January 18th of what? 1982? ?????
Make her background a bit more interesting, please. I couldn't read the second sentence because the grammar was very messed up.
Family:
If you create the rest of the family, don't forget to link them.
🙁 I'm sorry but your character had so many problems. You'll really need to fix that.

@WriteOutofTime

@WriteLikeYoureRunningOutOfTime here you are! I didn't see THAT many flaws, but I tried 😄
Overview-
If she has no other names just don't fill it out, same with other things
Nature-
If shes always so angry with the dragons, don't make her deadly call. It doesn't really made sense, at least make her a bit Hot-Headed.
Social-
In speaking of the religion and favorite possession you said something about rose-colored glasses? What are they? Where did they come from? Explain those somwuere, possibly in the looks category-or make your own folder explaining clothes.
Family-
Don't forget to link the father.
^^

Thank you! I have a question though. Do you think in order for her anger to be believable she has to be a hothead? Kinda the whole point of her character is that she suppresses emotions and is a good leader. Being a hothead would throw all of that out the window, wouldn't you say?? Also, rose-colored glasses is a real-world expression. People with overwhelming and oftentimes blind optimism are said to seeing things through rose tinted glasses or something along those lines. I will definitely link her husband to her character, thanks for catching that! And thanks for the critique! And excuse any typos, I'm on my phone :D

@AloeVera groupMentallyImInACottage

I've got two, one's been through many critiques so for him I'm really looking for the nitty-gritty sort of stuff, and the second one is more needing development and details.

big boi nerd- Yuki Whitman

independent wamen- Myst Blaire