@SavvyWrites
link is in the first thread, fire away, dont be ashamed to go drag it since i am an amatuer and accept criticism.
link is in the first thread, fire away, dont be ashamed to go drag it since i am an amatuer and accept criticism.
also i just did the pulic setting so thats all set lol
Okay then! First of all, I'd like to say that I love his hobbies. "Wiring, writing, cooking, plotting the deaths of innocents." That's…….that's a truly special character. Second of all, why does he hate non-humans so much, even if he is non-human himself? Why does he throw things when angry? What was his childhood like? Why is he the only one able to operate new tech? I think you might need to think more about the "why" behind everything and flesh him out a bit more. Also, this may be a minor gripe, but he would probably be a bit heavier in the weight section, considering he's 7"3.
So, I like him a lot, but I have a lot of questions. If his motivation is protecting the earth, why does he plot the death of innocents? Is it because he hates nonhumans? Why does he hate nonhumans when he himself is a nonhuman? Does he hate himself? As for his personality type, can you explain a little more what you mean? What does "determined to ensure survival by making sure the earth stays without truth" mean exactly? What truth? How is he keeping it from them? In the social section, why is he a Christian? If he's the leader, what is he the leader of, and what are his policies/stances/political leanings? Since he's the leader, he has more politics than most people, not less. His background is lacking, too. The background is your chance to tell us why he is the way he is. What were his previous relationships, experiences, etc. leading up to the story that are relevant?
I think he has the potential to be a very interesting villain. Just needs some fleshing out. Good luck.
thanks so much for the critiques, ill make some changes when i have the time, but this is very helpful, i appreciate the help as i am an inexperienced writer, again, thank you, and i will fix him when i can.
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