forum Critique My Main Character Please
Started by @IconicUsername
tune

people_alt 63 followers

@Wry_Wyvern

Looks:
-You said that her body type makes some physical activity difficult; is she overweight or does she have a certain medical condition?
-Missing weight & hair length, otherwise good description; I can definitely picture her.
Nature:
-Think a bit more about her mannerisms. What does she do when she's excited? Angry? Threatened? How about when she lies?
-She wants to be recognized; is there a certain thing she wants to be recognized for?
-Good prejudices. A thing to consider: judging people by speaking mannerisms means that she has a low opinion of anyone who doesn't speak her language fluently which can be a good side conflict.
-Ooh, what kind of dancing? Ballet, tap, hip-hop…?
-Mm okay so I'm scrolling through the nature section and I see prejudices, talents and hobbies that regular people have and then I see DRAGON RIDING and I think that's awesome.
-The Myers Briggs type indicator is a great place to start for the personality section but consider adding some traits (this page has a lot: http://ideonomy.mit.edu/essays/traits.html)
-I'm getting a "shy & insecure" vibe for her personality which is fine, but I don't really see any other traits. She has plenty of hobbies and stuff but I feel like she needs a few traits that I like to call "initiator traits", such as curiosity. A character whose main trait is overthinking things and being invisible won't make a good protagonist; protagonists need to take some sort of action in the story. Also, her personality (Campaigner) seems to conflict with the personality traits you put in the motivations/flaws section.
-I notice that this series takes place over a period of 5 years or so. Which motivations, flaws, prejudices, and personality traits change as she goes through her Character Arc™?
Social:
-How does her religion affect her personality/outlook on life?
-She likes equal rights, yay, but where does she stand in other political issues that are prominent in her universe?
-"Pizza, ice cream, and fried chicken" Me too.
History:
-MORE BACKSTORY. What "bad experiences" at Earthen schools? What about her past has shaped her? You have a promising character; this is your chance to make her more interesting!

Overall, you have a solid idea, and after you flesh her out a bit you'll be good to go. Happy writing!

@IconicUsername

Just re-read and the shy and insecure vibe you're getting from her is somewhat inaccurate. XD
Probably because I didn't mention much of her hyper nature, because she's anything but shy.