forum Critique my character?
Started by @@Wanheda
tune

people_alt 3 followers

@Becfromthedead group

She looks really good overall. The only thing I would say is clarify motivations a bit more. What fear motivates her? Fear of failure? Of death? Something else? Also fear doesn't usually work out well as a sole motivation, so you might be better off adding a little something else to it if you see fit.
And this isn't a critique, just a question, but Ruby is Eden's sister, right? Is Ruby listed as other name because they're twins and often get mixed up?

@@Wanheda

Basically, Eden is illegal because she is the second born child. Normally, they would have aborted one of the twins (because resources are scarce and overpopulation by just one person can potentially kill everyone.) Ruby is the twin sister who gets to go out into the world. Eden has been locked up for most of her life, because switching out could get them caught. Eden getting mistaken for Ruby is going to be a central plot point.

A Name With No Girl

A Name With No Girl

Thought it can help you with your character because this movie also deals with identical siblings realationships, a world where people are allow to have only one child, and imparsonating to another person in order yo hide the fact that you have siblings. In this movie everyone must have one child, and when someone gives birth to seven identical girls (and dies in birth) her father decides to raise all seven of them as one person - Karen - and each one of the girls gets to live as Karen one day of the week. From the premise you wrote, I assumed this is the direction you were going for. Sorry if I have mistaken ><'