forum Critique my character?

Started February 28, 2020 by @bluejaya

tune

I'm looking for someone to help critique my character! any and all criticism or additions are welcome. They're part of a realistic contemporary world. I'm still working the plot, so any thoughts on that are also welcome.

I'll give it a shot!
So their description is pretty bare, I mean, I kind of get the idea of what they looks like but its hard to tell for sure. Instead of saying their hairstyle is "usually up" explain it more! That can mean a lot of things. Is It in two pigtails? One ponytail? Is it straight or wavy? Do they have bangs? Is their hair fine and textured? And the same thing about their hair color. Blonde-brown can mean a lot of things! Is it dirty blonde? Ombre?
Ok, now onto the rest of Eve!
For their motivations, in what way do they motivate them and way? What do they do about it?
Their mannerisms are okay, but I think you can add some more and expand on them! What do they do when they're nervous? Excited? Angry? Maybe they bites their nails. Or maybe they have a hard time making eye contact. People in real life have many, many mannerisms! They make characters feel human and not just like a name on a piece of paper! So I say give them more and make them more in depth!
Their flaws are good so far, but most people have a lot more than 3 flaws! And expand on the ones they has all ready.
Explain how they're selfish, what makes them lazy, etc. And give them 3-5 more flaws at least! Flaws are super super important when making characters! Flaws are what can make or break a character, they are what draw in the connection between the character and the reader. Without them, the reader can't relate to the character.
On their personality type, explain their personality, not just their meyers briggs type. I'm too lazy to do my research and try and figure out all the personality types of an ENF-P. What are their good traits? their flaws? Why do they act the way they do? Explain!
I think you should try and explain why their favorites are their favorites as well. Remember, no one knows what this character is like except you, so you're going to have to do a lot of explaining on some of the sections! But its always good to write as much info down as you can, that's what these are for after all! Whats so cool about lions? Why do they like sugary things so much!
Oof, their history section is very bare. Just telling me they "lives in a nice area" doesn't really tell me anything about them, other than where they lives. What was their childhood like? How did they do in school? Did they have a lot of friends? What were their relationship like with their parents? What were some parts in their life that made them to who they are? Explain! Again, thats what it's there for!
Good luck!