forum Critique my character!

Started August 21, 2018 by Deleted user

tune

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Hi everyone! If you could take a look at my brand-new charcter Samarah, I'd be super happy! Thanks!Invalid Character

I'll take a look at her.

@That_One_Lavender_Owl_that's_into_Sci-Fi thanks!

Alright

OVERVEIW
All good here. You could say who calls her what nickname if you want. Also, female would be a better word then girl

LOOKS
What differences are there between Asterrens and humans? Just curious.
You could definitely elaborate on her body type.
Is it intentional for her to be overweight? Just checking.

NATURE
The mannerisms are great! There would definitely be no harm in a couple more or so though.
More flaws would be ideal. They're parallel to her best qualities. She seems like the type that would isolate herself.
I think more hobbies could work. Hobbies are things you enjoy. Even if you aren't very good at them.

SOCIAL
No friends? At all?
Unless this is something specific to your world, state what kind of sovereign she is. If it's something you came up with, elaborate on it.

FAMILY
Even if they aren't important, list who her parents and siblings are. Also elaborate on her relationship with her family.

POWERS
You're good here, but maybe say more on what drains her energy.

@That_One_Lavender_Owl_that's_into_Sci-Fi thanks, that was so helpful! I will take all these suggestions! (And Asterrens are a humanoid-type person from the world i am building, who live in the fictional country asterra!) :)