forum Could someone please critique my character?

Started February 12, 2018 by @Penelope L

tune

Hi! Could someone please critique my character? I'd love some constructive criticism, as I have no idea whether she is good or not.

Thanks!!

Can you elaborate on where the green streak in her hair came from? Or maybe what the story/universe is about and if it's normal there, because I got confused on both the violet eyes and green steak since they're very unnatural. And why were they left by the trees? I think it could be an amazing character if you just added more detail and elaborated, even on the small things.

your personality and nature pages are very vague, and they lead me to believe that she is incredibly entitled, as she looks down on those that she 'deems lesser' than her. Also, is it set up in your universe that people can have purple eyes and white hair? thats a mild mary-sue move.
Other than that, you have the great working of a character that can be very interesting with some work

Thank you guys sooo much! I will go back and add more detail in these areas.

I think you made an awesome character, although it would be cool if you gave her a scar or tattoo. That would make her even more interesting.

There are several questions you can ask yourself to help you get further into understanding your character. For example:
-Why did her mother leave her and her brother in the woods?
-Did she not know they had powers? Or did she and was scared of them? If so, why was she scared? Did they do something to scare her?
-What was her mother's reasoning?
-What in her mother's past made her able to abandon her children?

Hope this helps ;)
~Natalie F

Thank you all sooo much!!

I think Ana is very interesting and you're seem very talented, but as some of the others I think there are some things that seem a bit unnatural. Also, I think she seems a bit tooooo mature for her age, but thats up to you.