forum Anything to improve on my character's backstory?
Started by @Friendlyglittery7 group
tune

people_alt 3 followers

@Friendlyglittery7 group

This is my side character's (Blizzard) backstory that explains why he wanted to become a caretaker. Whilst I am already happy with his backstory, I kinda felt that some parts of his story didn't make enough sense. Like the part where Blizzard lets his children go.
For whoever critiques his story, thank you for helping me improvise my story! :D

P.S. To prevent confusion, the characters are wolves.

Onto the backstory!

Before Chari was born, Blizzard was a single wolf with no children.
He sees a female wolf (Ruth) walking with her 2 pups occasionally.
One night, Blizzard woke up to find Ruth's children sleeping beside him. He was confused but played along.
In the morning, his new-found illegimate children woke him up calling him "Daddy"
He becomes more confused this time so he tells him where their mother is but the kids avoided this question for they don't know. Blizzard asks them more questions before taking off to Ruth with her pups.
When Blizzard visited Ruth, Ruth lies to him that she is critically ill and that she gave him her pups so they don't catch the disease. Ruth also tells him that she is a bad mother (She is) and that she'd like her kids back once they hit puberty.
Blizzard felt something was off but kept her promise anyway.
For years, Blizzard raised them as if they were his kids.
When the time has come for his illegimate puppies to go back to their mother, he visits her once again.
Unfortunately, Ruth opens up to him that she doesn't want her kids back at any time because she believes her pups are the spawn of the devil. (Jk, she hates them because of her spirituality)
Blizzard insisted but Ruth doesn't change her mind. It got to the point Ruth threatens to hurt Blizzard and kill her pups if he doesn't leave.
Blizzard gave in and reluctantly left her den with an insult to her face.
Next, he decides to comfort his children but realizes that they run off.
He hurriedly struggles to find his puppies but he does.
The two siblings requested to be free from their foster father and their dumb mother, promising that they will find Blizzard again.
Blizzard accepts their request and then the siblings stray away into the wilderness.

That's when he knew he was a compassionate person for raising his non-biological pups that don't deserve to be with their biological mom.
In honor of his kindness and especially for the 2 pups he raised, he dedicated his life to being a foster father and protector for children who are abandoned or with abusive parents.

@Riorlyne pets

Okay, so here are a couple of issues I can see with the backstory:

  • Ruth's excuses are contradictory. If she is critically ill, she won't live until her pups hit puberty, so it doesn't make sense for her to ask for them back at that time.
  • Wouldn't Blizzard see Ruth occasionally after accepting to take in her pups and realise that she's not ill?
  • I think after raising the pups for years Blizzard would become attached to them, if he truly is a compassionate and kind wolf. He might not want to give them back to their undeserving mother, and I think if she showed no interest in them he might not try to give them back. This would lead to not having an argument with her about her not taking them back.
  • Why do the pups want to be free from the kind wolf that raised them?
  • Usually in adoption/foster stories of this type, it's the biological parent that wants the kids back later and doesn't deserve them, and the foster parent trying to keep the kids so that they're well taken care of, which is probably why having it the opposite way around feels strange.

@NobleWolf

I know you want critique on your backstory but I just want to tell you how happy I am to see I'm not the only one who has animals as main characters