Tell me...
Why should I play this game of pretend?
Considering all of the things you have done.
"Such a great son and beloved boy!"
Oh, how they cry so loud and filled with sorrow.
How I could curl up and hide in our room.
There in my bed, still sobbing like yesterday.
Not when my Dictator has finally fallen.
Why would I give in to all of the gloom?
When you have given me no reason to mourn.
You see, in my eyes, my Dictator is gone.
So...
Why should I have a heavy heart?
Why should I go and fall to pieces?
Why should I mourn you at all?
Not when,
You took your time and you tore me down!
Not when,
You had your fun and left me alone!
You were supposed to be my second half!
- - - - -
Asher sighs as he makes his way through the grand hallways of the castle he was raised in. He runs his hands on the golden ornaments decorating the walls as his favorite instrumental music plays from his mini-player tucked away in his robe pocket. He could hear the bustling of servants just in the adjacent hallway and he can't help but frown in disdain. The last thing he wanted to do tonight was get together with his siblings and father and talk about him. He didn't even want to see Rose, he didn't want to watch Raja and Kastra share a stilted conversation, above all else, he did not want to see his father stare at the two empty chairs he refused to get rid of.
Asher knew the meal would be mainly favorites of his mother and him, and which meant he would only eat half of what was available. Asher knew someone would try to bring in him into the conversation, to talk about him, which was the last person he wanted to talk about. Rose's studies, he could deal with. The tension withing Kastra's ranks, he could discuss. Raja's attempts at getting father to back, also doable. But not him, even mother would be a better topic than him. Asher wanted nothing to do with the boy who abandoned his family, regardless of how he went about doing it.
"Prince Asher!"
Asher groans and straightens his outer robes turning to the butler coming up to him. "Yes Sir Avery?"
The butler, Avery, stands beside Asher with his hands behind his back, "Sir, your father requested I come and ensure you come to tonight's anniversary dinner."
Asher huffs raising his chin, "Not like I have an actual choice do I?" Avery gives Asher a sad smile but Asher continues. "Besides, I would never insult Mother's memory by refusing to show. Not to mention Big Sister would force me to come."
"Yes, Princess Kastra would probably drag you down regardless of your wishes. Even so, Prince Asher, you must wish to come of your own wish? At the very least to see Princess Rosallyn."
Asher snorts and starts walking away, confident Butler Avery would follow. "Why would I want to see the fool who chases a memory?"
"Prince Asher," Avery says softly, and a small piece of Asher's heartbreaks. He sighs and looks back at the sad expression on Avery's face. "Prince Asher. I know you are hurting from your brother and mother's death. The whole royal family is trying to deal with it in their own way but Prince Asher. It hurts so much watching you refuse to acknowledge your own pain."
Asher shakes his head, "I have accepted my pain, Avery. I have mourned my mother and I continue to mourn her every day. But I will never mourn my brother, he doesn't deserve it. Rose has chosen to leave and chase a ghost. Big sister chooses to throw herself into the army as I did my studies and work and as Father did. And big brother, poor big brother, choose to fight and keep us all together."
Avery sighs, "Prince Raja is strong, but he cannot hold up this family alone."
"No he cannot," Asher agrees. "That is why I will be no burden to him. My feelings regarding Vidar are not one of some hidden mourning. They will never be." Asher turns from Avery continues to walk away, pausing before entering a new hallway in the direction of his bedroom chambers. "I will be at the dinner, Avery. For my mother and my beloved elder brother." With that, the conversation was over.
Avery did not chase the young prince and Asher did not look back.