@Consider-PB_and_the_Jellies
“It’s 4:20, make a wish.”
I missed it :(
“It’s 4:20, make a wish.”
I missed it :(
it's an hour away here so you can still celebrate Midwestern 4:20
“It’s 4:20, make a wish.”
I missed it :(
lmao this was a few days ago, I just saw 4:20 on my clock a few minutes ago and thought of it
Me: 420, what you smoking? 😂
Me 2: Your dick.
Me: 😓………..Why? We don't have one.
Me 2: * shrug * I'm bored.
Me: HaLp!!! 😲
Me 3: 💒 THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU DEMON!!! RETURN TO WHICH YE CAME!!!
Me 2: * yeets self out the window *
Me: Thanks, bro! 😘
Me 3: No problem, bro! 😘
(This is only part of the weird shit that happens in my head because of my toxic [ex] friends)
"90% of my dumb thoughts happen in my brain."
(same here)
me: -walking past some 6th graders-
some random kid: com'n bro, hurry up, I'm hungry as a butt cheek
me -gives weird look-
My sister: Did they say New Zealand?
My dad: No. I'm not sure where they are but it's not New Zealand.
Me: I mean, I would've thought that was obvious from the way they drove five hours to somewhere else in the U.S.
My sister: Well I don't know where New Zealand is!
My sister: Did they say New Zealand?
My dad: No. I'm not sure where they are but it's not New Zealand.
Me: I mean, I would've thought that was obvious from the way they drove five hours to somewhere else in the U.S.
My sister: Well I don't know where New Zealand is!
I'm from New Zealand
My sister: Did they say New Zealand?
My dad: No. I'm not sure where they are but it's not New Zealand.
Me: I mean, I would've thought that was obvious from the way they drove five hours to somewhere else in the U.S.
My sister: Well I don't know where New Zealand is!I'm from New Zealand
Would you mind confirming for her that it is not, in fact, a five hour drive from America?
My sister: Did they say New Zealand?
My dad: No. I'm not sure where they are but it's not New Zealand.
Me: I mean, I would've thought that was obvious from the way they drove five hours to somewhere else in the U.S.
My sister: Well I don't know where New Zealand is!I'm from New Zealand
Would you mind confirming for her that it is not, in fact, a five hour drive from America?
Definitely not! We are three islands next to Australia.
Me, pointing a water gun at my cat (after chasing her off the table): Stand down!
My cat: walks forward
Me: I SAID STAND DOWN! shoots water in my cat's face
Me: hey you lil pISS BABY–
My entire family: What's wrong with you
"BE GAY DO CRIME! but six feet apart, stay safe."
"We need some hand sanditizer."
Me: Happy Birthday, bitch.
Wall: It's not my birthday.
Me: …
Wall: …
Me: Then Merry Unbirthday, bitch.
(I'm so lonely. 😢)
Me: Happy Birthday, bitch.
Wall: It's not my birthday.
Me: …
Wall: …
Me: Then Merry Unbirthday, bitch.(I'm so lonely. 😢)
(HAPPY BIRTHDAY, IVY, YOU ARE THE SPECIAL BIRTHDAY [DEMONETIZED]—)
Me: Happy Birthday, bitch.
Wall: It's not my birthday.
Me: …
Wall: …
Me: Then Merry Unbirthday, bitch.(I'm so lonely. 😢)
(HAPPY BIRTHDAY, IVY, YOU ARE THE SPECIAL BIRTHDAY [DEMONETIZED]—)
(I'm confused. What's demonetized?)
"You can't spell 'Luffy' without 'Illiterate'"
"what?"
Me: Happy Birthday, bitch.
Wall: It's not my birthday.
Me: …
Wall: …
Me: Then Merry Unbirthday, bitch.(I'm so lonely. 😢)
(HAPPY BIRTHDAY, IVY, YOU ARE THE SPECIAL BIRTHDAY [DEMONETIZED]—)
(I'm confused. What's demonetized?)
(Oh it's just a thing I say to censor stuff. It's like how a YouTube video might get demonetized if it has inappropriate content, meaning they won't put ads on the video)
Me: Happy Birthday, bitch.
Wall: It's not my birthday.
Me: …
Wall: …
Me: Then Merry Unbirthday, bitch.(I'm so lonely. 😢)
(HAPPY BIRTHDAY, IVY, YOU ARE THE SPECIAL BIRTHDAY [DEMONETIZED]—)
(I'm confused. What's demonetized?)
(Oh it's just a thing I say to censor stuff. It's like how a YouTube video might get demonetized if it has inappropriate content, meaning they won't put ads on the video)
(Oh, that makes sense now.)
Me: Happy Birthday, bitch.
Wall: It's not my birthday.
Me: …
Wall: …
Me: Then Merry Unbirthday, bitch.(I'm so lonely. 😢)
(HAPPY BIRTHDAY, IVY, YOU ARE THE SPECIAL BIRTHDAY [DEMONETIZED]—)
(I'm confused. What's demonetized?)
(Oh it's just a thing I say to censor stuff. It's like how a YouTube video might get demonetized if it has inappropriate content, meaning they won't put ads on the video)
(Oh, that makes sense now.)
(It was also a reference to this song)
So, we were playing Minecraft with our science teacher. He has absolutely no idea how to do anything.
Mr.M: Whoever killed me is failing this class
Me: Kills him
Me: Sorry, have a door as an apology.
Him: Hits me with the door YOU HAVE GIVEN ME A WEAPON
Me: Kills him Not today Satan
"Ben is going to JFK me with his piss."
"Ben is going to JFK me with his piss."
This made me laugh way more than I should have
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